I'm seeing someone tomorrow that specializes in trans people. Even though I've been in therapy for two years, I'm still nervous and not sure how to process the situation because I'm so nervous. Help?
What are your aims? There are two ways to go about the session, depending on what you want. Are you trying to resolve your gender issues, or are you using the session as a way to gain access to hormones or surgery? Beyond that, what do you need help with?
I get tired of having to explain my case to people. I literally had to tell six people or more when I was hospitalized that I'm trans* and it's getting really tiring. I'm worried I'll say the wrong thing and it will push me further away from hormones and surgery. (That wrong thing being that I told a friend I would off myself if I wasn't able to transition or I don't gain progress soon)
Ahh, I know the feeling. I never told anyone that, but I sure as hell thought it. I've said this before, and not everyone agreed with me, but I'm saying it again. You don't have to be honest with the therapist if your aim is to use them as a transitioning tool. If you're using them for therapeutic benefit, then its different, but it doesn't look as if that is your intention. I've been through the psychological assessment phase before. It sucks. I hate the way we have to work so hard to prove our gender, when everyone else's is just self evident. Just figure out what the therapist wants to hear, and take it from there. Don't talk about any emotional difficulties, other than dysphoria. Then get referred to someone who can give you hormones. The therapy can be terrible though, can't it? I remember, I'd just been referred to a trans specialist, and she said something along the lines of "So you've been having a few uncertainties about your gender". I was fully passing, I had changed my name, I had a male passport, and I was living full time as a guy, and she thought I was having uncertainties. I just stared at her. She said: "well, certainties, then." (the quality of the session just went downhill from there).
I was reading what Hexagon wrote and...well, damn! I haven't even come out as a trans guy yet, but I know at some point I'll have to go to a "trans specialist" or whatever their title is in the near future. Is it really that difficult to find a good therapist? It's a shame you have to maneuver through their pointless questions. If they are a trans specialist, I would've hoped they'd understand their patients much better then what I'm reading about them.
In my area, it sort of is. It might be a Google search away, but even though I'm in a county/city where there are protection laws for trans people, there's very few resources IMO. All the major help is in Philadelphia and I can't drive two hours for therapy. Gas doesn't come cheap and the traffic here is such a mess. It would be a huge hassle to do it so often. Thankfully while I was in the hospital the staff was kind enough to do research for me so they could schedule an appointment for me.
I have the session at 2PM EST so I still have time to kill until then. I'm pretty sure I'll go in as a blubbering idiot since I'm getting over having an emotional episode (a good one, not a bad one). I'm spending my time now checking out transbucket to see if who I'll go with since I'm still stuck on that. (sigh) I'll update when my session ends.