okay, so long story short, none of my friends in real life know I'm gay. And I let a friend at work hook me up on a date with another one of her friends from school, who happens to be a guy, by the way. And I've been texting him and we've already agreed on a place and time and he's really nice but I just can't go through with it because I know I won't be able to give him the relationship he wants. And I can't think of a good excuse for why I want to back out of the date and I sure as hell can't tell him it's because I'm gay because he'll tell my friend who will then tell other people and maybe if I didn't live in such a judgmental, churchy place, then that would be okay. But it's not. So I'm pretty much up the creek without a paddle. :dry:
Could you text him ...something came up? or say like You're sick working late? or caring for a friend?
Yeah I could. I guess I just feel bad because he told me about how girls always blow him off because he's not the most attractive or skinny guy. And telling him something like that would be very obviously blowing him off. Plus, that would just make me have to push our date back to another day. Oh well, guess I just gotta put on my big girl pants and deal with it. lol
Well first of all.. You shouldn't let your friend hook you up with dates anymore or else it could lead to this situation again. Second of all if I were you then I would do is go on with the date then afterwards I would say that he wasn't my type and that I'm not into relationships right now because I want to focus on school/work but the only downside I could see in my suggestion is that he could be wondering what did he do wrong.
just tell him if he brings the blowing off thing that it shouldn't matter about appearance and that if a girl is truly interested in him then she'll do it because she's interested in the person he is. Tell him that it take a while to get a perfect bite but that he'll get there
how about - you tell him you're not ready to date right now, like anyone (to him that means guys)? he won't see you slobbering over guys so he can't call you out for ditching him. it's perfectly normal to not want to be in a relationship for the time being, just be like you need your space, you're emotionally a little unstable (that's optional, ha) but you can always be friends, perhaps your meetup doesn't even have to be a formal date? more like two people getting to know each other?
All of you are right...about a lot of things, lol. Maybe not getting myself into these kinds of situations would be wise in the future and I'll just let him down gently.
I am not a fan of lying and making up excuses. I would just call him and say that you need to cancel for personal reasons and leave it at that. Your reasons for canceling are none of his business and you are under no obligation to tell him.
