So before I get into my whole problem I should introduce myself since I'm new today. My name is billy, I live near Los Angeles, I play a sport called waterpolo. I love math. I love pizza and pasta (who doesn't). I'm not openly gay. And by now you get the general idea so I will get into it ___________________________ At the end of summer, when school hasn't quite started but the sport I play, water polo, has, a new guy walked into the pool area. I thought it would be like any other start of a season, the coach gives a speech, introduces himself and all the players, and we get in the pool and start our practice. But before the coach gave his opening remarks I saw someone walk in. I had seen him before at the beach with his friends. So I hung out with him for a little bit I thought he was pretty cool, so we became friends. We were just simply friends and we didn't know each other too well. Then came a tournament out in San Diego. Every year it is tons of fun. Our whole team stays at a hotel, we play game after game of waterpolo, and most importantly we get tons of team bonding time and we get to know each other pretty well. This is where I think I got to know Nathan (the new kid) much better. I began to fall for him a little bit. At the time I didn't know I was gay so it was kind of weird for me. Over time I became best friends with him. I tried my hardest not to fall for him because I was pretty sure he was straight. I really wish I could just ask him. He is showing me tons of signs, but I don't know if I'm reading them right. The other day I was at the beach with him and I wish I just knew if he was gay because I would have just told him right there. I'm at a loss for what to do. My whole life I have stayed away from relationships, thinking that spending hours in the library teaching myself calculus was a better use of my time. I don't know if there is some game theory equation that will help me through this one or not. But I just need some advice. I will definitely post some follow ups to this. But until then, thank you all!♥
I love pizza but actually hate pasta XD but on to the topic.. I kind of have the same problem as you since I met him through a friend of mines and he gives me signs to me but I just think of them as what a close friend would do since if I give it a second thought then I would have a harder time resisting the urge to fall for him even more. Could you cone out to me? Since coming out to him might ease the crush for him if you knew his sexuaility and if you could maybe do the same actions he does to you by doing that back to him and see how he reacts? Since I tried to do that to my friend and he reacts the same way I do which is hard for me to tell... But I hope your doesnt reacts the same as you just like mines.. And maybe that way it would be easier for you ^^
Bro, I so know how you feel and I can tell you there is no way to be a hundred percent sure someone is gay unless they tell you themselves. Wish I was a mind reader!! Lol I would say continue to a Hang out with him to see what happens but I feel like that's very unhealthy. For me when I like someone its easy to miss read those signs which could just be friendly gestures, so I try not to put to much emphasis in them. As for if you should tell him, well that's a risk you will have to be willing to make for several reasons. 1. You would be basically coming out. 2. He could tell all your other team mates. 3. This could mess up the best friend dynamic. So if you think telling him is worth the risk because you know you really like him then by all means go for it. Now for this bit of advise which I should probably do some more of myself. I say when your ready to, you may never be, come out. Do it at your own pace, thats how I'm going about it, every day a little more. You don't have to come out to him but to whoever you care to tell. At that point more opportunities for romance will open up to you.
HEY! I'm from san diego! haha. I thought I'd point that out. I would suggest that if you are ready, and you know he's trusting.. that you come out to him. What kind of signs does he give that makes you think your friend is gay? He could just possibly be a little *feminine* as a guy. But you need to really think if its worth it. If come out to him and he tells the whole team thus outting you to everyone, would you be okay with it? And do you think that telling him you have feelings for him would be worth possibly ruining the relationship? If I were you, I would come out to him. If you think he's mature enough to handle it. I hope my advice was helpful Have a nice day
Dear billy : You want to know if he's gay or not ? Ask him, say " Nathan, I don't know if your aware of this, but I'm gay, and I was just wondering if you are too " ? And if he says NO, then just walk away, pretend nothing happened. Your to good of a person to let this bother you. gayboy66
