Hi guys ! So, yeah, I was wondering a couple of things, and it's kind of a general question to be honest. See, in our society, if you take an hetereosexual environment, it's rather common that people flirt with each other, find people attractive and hit on each other, regardless of the other person's sexual identity (Say, some guys might flirt with lesbians, without even knowing at first, and in the end, it's ok...). But, how do you do it when you're a women who's attracted to one of your straight acquaintance? 'cause that is what happens to me sometimes. I wouldn't say anything and would start to feel kinda uncomfortable because I'd be afraid to be too obvious. We're rather open about people's sexuality over here in Belgium, so I'm not afraid, I'm just really deeply embarassed about how I feel. Plus, it is actually a thing that happens with pretty much anyone I feel attracted to, me or women. The problem is that most of the time, they're acquaintances ('cause for me, it works with the alchemy between two people. See, how I get along with someone is directly linked with how much I feel drawn to someone). And when I'm around the person concerned, I just start to get really nervous and awkward, and try to relax about it, you know. So I mean, if it were only strangers, that wouldn't be so much of a problem. I mean, how can I deal with my feelings that embrass me so much ? Do you have any advice for me ? (Luckily I'm not a man, it doesn't show much, haha, saved o/)
I find that the "You can look but not flirt or touch" motto fits in with straight people. Try to gay-dar it and only interact flirtatious with people that come off lesbian or bi. Sometimes it's hard to tell so you have to ask indirect questions to get them to admit that they are bi or lesbian. Ask, "Do you have a boyfriend?" If they are gay they will answer "No I have a girlfriend" or "I'm a lesbian" but careful not to offend them or step on their toes if you ask. Good luck!
Angelzflyyy is absolutely correct in the sense that you shouldn't attempt anything. When your attracted to the same sex, but your crush is not, then it is best to keep the admiration at a distance per say. From my experience with coming out to any guy friends (i think only one knows) the first thing he asked was not to be hit on, and surprisingly... the reason i came out is because i thought he was gay and i had a crush on him... So the moral here is that straight friends are very accepting and it's good to understand their comfort zone as they recognize the same for you And if you do hope something will happen, let it play out on it's own, you could ask her if she is or not, but don't take it to far and try not to offend her. Good luck, and go get 'em tiger ;D
Haha, thanks Well, I do not mean to offend people. See, I am just nice to people I like, in general. I think I'm flirtarious sometimes even without thinking about it, but when I'm aware of what I'm doing, I just start to be awkward and try to act different no to make them uncomfortable... But I still feel like I'm gonna be really that obvious. Would you reckon I don't talk to them x) ?
