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Old 31st Jul 2013, 05:19 PM   #1
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Default How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

I know this is an awkward question, but menstruating always means dysphoria for me and I'm lost on how to deal with it. It's worse because I'm irregular, so I never know when it's coming and it leads to a lot of self-loathing and, sometimes, suicidal ideation. I also tend to have heavy, long periods, which makes it even worse. It's especially hard because I'm right in the midst of trying to start socially transitioning, and when I start menstruating I feel like I'm getting set back further and further, and I'm in a really bad place right now; I mean, what kind of guy would be comfortable with bleeding out of their genitals for a week?

So, in light of all this, how can I get through it (on a psychological, not physical level)?
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Old 31st Jul 2013, 09:26 PM   #2
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

There are many people that take birth control pills to stop having their period all together (because they don't like getting it/it's annoying)... have you considered that option?
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Old 31st Jul 2013, 10:07 PM   #3
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

Actually most of my friends do that and it really works. All of them say their peroids are lighter and shorter if they don't stop all together! It might be worth talking to your doctor about if you are comfortable with that. Also you are going to need your parents' consent or a forgery of their signiture to give you permission because you are underage. You don't have to come out as FtM but you can just explain that your peroids are heavy/long and they might be okay. Dunno how religious (thats usually the main blocker that i know of for going on birth control) they are but its worth mentioning! hope that helps sorry if its a littke ramble-y
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 09:47 AM   #4
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

I can sympathise, i ended up severely anemic (low iron count in my blood) thanks to - & this was the exact phrase used - 'chronic blood loss' , thanks to periods :-( Dr immediately put me on birth control, which as someone who identifies as ftm, was pretty cool! It really made things alot better for me. 1 little tablet every day & i dont need to think about the other option..
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 10:51 AM   #5
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

I'd second the others. If it gives you severe dysphoria, birth control pills might be the way to go.

Personally, I'm the "plug and try and forget it exists" type. Will be honest and say that it doesn't give me severe dysphoria because while it's irritating and I've had panic attacks when I'm not expecting it, I again try and mentally distance myself from it.

If you do decide to do HRT, your periods tend to stop after some time (not sure how long into it but I've got it down somewhere) on T. So there's always that and the option of getting a hystorectomy in the near future.

Now to look into the pills for myself...
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 11:00 AM   #6
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

Have you tried using a menstrual cup, like the Diva Cup? I've been using it for over a year, and I can safely say it's about the best purchase I ever made.

Although it won't let you avoid dealing with the blood and crap, the advantage is that you only need to empty it in the morning and evening, and you can forget about it in between. It's an amazing product which I would recommend in a heartbeat. It also saves you a lot of money because it only needs to be replaced every few years.

I used to hate my period, but now it's become a lot easier to deal with.
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 11:25 AM   #7
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

I never had periods. Anyway, there are better options that birth control pills, if you can find them. Hormone blockers (or if you're really lucky, testosterone). You'll need your parents consent, unfortunately, but basically the blockers should stop your periods and prevent any further effects of puberty. They're completely reversible, and routinely offered to teens. I don't know exactly how to go about getting them in your area, you'll have to do that research yourself, but if nothing else, start by going to a qualified psychologist.
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 12:59 PM   #8
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

I've been on testosterone for two months now (two months on hormone blockers prior) and my periods have only decreased slightly. I still experience cramping and cyclical moodiness. (I'm on suprefact which stops hormone production in the ovaries, though my monthly cycles haven't ceased yet.) I'm unsure of when it'll stop completely, but I don't have to deal with horrendous menstruation cycles like I did before T and blockers.

With birth control, progestin-only pills generally make periods much lighter and shorter though they could lead to spotting and/or irregular cycles. And I'd make sure you look into a BC with a low amount of estrogen as well, because some BCs can actually feminize your body more and increase dysphoria. There's also Depo-Provera injections you can take which stops menstruation entirely (though for some it can make periods heavier for a while before it kicks in). I honestly don't know very much about birth control because I've never been on it but these are just suggestions I've come across before I was put on blockers.

Sorry to hear about the dysphoria. I hope you can find a solution soon.
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 10:43 PM   #9
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

Thanks so much for your advice, everybody, but I've got a big problem... I can't take birth control because there's no way my mom would let me. She's very unsupportive; she thinks this is a phase and whenever I bring it up, she just rolls her eyes, then immediately resorts to yelling at me and calling me fake. She's insensitive about it, too... she'll make fun of me for it (making hurtful comments about my chest, or lack of male genitals) and then everybody will laugh about it, and she acts like it's no big deal. When I asked for something as small as to start wearing stereotypical male clothes, she yelled at me; if I were to ask her for something like birth control, she'd freak out on me. Is there anything I can do to make myself feel better on a mental level?


PS: This doesn't have anything to do with periods, but I thought I'd ask anyway- my mom's constant badgering is making me feel worse about this whole gender situation, which is bad enough as it is, and I don't think she'll stop. Can anybody offer advice on how to get through it?
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Old 1st Aug 2013, 11:38 PM   #10
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Default Re: How do I deal with periods? (FtM)

sigh, this is terrible. I feel for you. Try to ignore what she is saying. Imagine a wall around yourself or a shell that protects you from all the negativity. If you are to listen to that for years, it can be very bad. Try to protect yourself before it makes a deep scar *hug*
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