Well, I finally found out my rooming assignment for college a few hours ago, and I found out that I just happen to have 3 roommates, all guys! Talk about a sausage-fest :lol: Anyway, I thought about this for a while, but I can't seem to decide what to do...so, I decided to ask all you guys! Do you guys think it's better to just rip the Band-Aid off and tell them all that I'm gay, or should I just not tell them at all? Half of me just wants to tell them to get it over with, since I'm not ashamed of who I am anymore, but the other half of me is just kinda worried on how they react. I mean, I'm not afraid of what they might say, I just don't want to deal with homophobes for a year (since I'll probably pop off and all hell will break loose). So, what do you guys think I should do? :help::help::help: Hugs for all those who help me (*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)
If you're going to tell them, I would do it sooner rather than later. You're staying in the dorms, right? Most schools will let you move out and get different roommates if there are problems. So if any of them are homophobic, it will be easier to switch rooms if you do it early in the semester.
Well, first of all, are you completely out/comfortable with outing yourself? Also, before I go to college (I go in a couple days) I'm going to get a feel as to how my roommates are. If they seem like they wouldn't be okay with it, I don't particularly want to put myself in an unsafe place. That's one thing to keep in mind. If they start to bully you, act weird, etc, you can talk to your RA and your school to see if they can accommodate you, move you to another dorm, etc. It also depends on what school you are going too. I'm going to a super liberal, extremely lgbtq influenced/friendly college, so if there is ever a problem, I know I'll have the support of my peers and the administration. I'm a girl, but I feel like these are general tips that would work for us college bound students.
I'd say tell them first off as well. That's what I'm planning on doing when I first get there. Makes things over and done with, and you can move if they give you crap
Just finished my freshman year in the closet and it was awful. Be upfront if you can be, and start off honest. I assure you you'll be much happier, and if it doesn't work out you can request a new room...at least you could in my college. Seriously, tell them upfront will save you such a headache. If at all possible do not live in the closet at college...it was one of the most depressing things I've experienced. It's such a wonderful opportunity to be yourself, please make it count. Good luck with school otherwise, I hope it goes well well!
Thanks for the advice everyone!!!!! I think I'll just go ahead and let them all know that I'm gay and see what happens Let's hope for the best!!! (!) (&&&)(&&&)(&&&)
Definitely tell them. I lived alone for my first two years of college, but I have a roommate now for summer school and I told him before we moved in. It was definitely good that knows and is okay with it. My boyfriend actually sleeps over a few times a week. I wish I had come out freshman year, things would've been better good luck!
I wouldn't tell them, but that's just me and my policy of not making a big deal of it, in the end it IS something private you don't tell people right away, and I don't see that as lying or being ashamed of one self, its just irrelavant when just meeting someone. Now I know these aren't random guys, they are people you will be sharing a room with, but if in time you do become close (some roomies cant stand each other) and you consider you want them to know or if it comes natural in certain moment then that's a different story. I mean, if I just met a guy and he says: "Hi my name is x and I'm gay, you got a problem with that?", I would be like WTF, but again that's just me, if you already made up your mind then that's what you should do. Good luck in any case and please enjoy college, I just finished and wanna go back so bad! Un abrazo, Diego.
The plan on telling them is great and all but just make sure that you don't compromise your safety. You should get a general read as to what kind of people they are before telling them so that you don't end up getting yourself in a dangerous situation.
I think you made the right decision. Good luck and let us know how everything goes! With aloha, Milan
my advice is that u tell them now insted of later and if they give u bull-shit gust ask for a new dorm (*hug*) p.s im not good at this kind of advice but like u say i try
Thank you sooooo much everyone for the advice! (*hug*) So far, I was able to tell one of my roommates, and he was totally fine with it! Haha, he did seem like a mellow guy anyway! So, I'm pretty stoked about that, one down, two to go
WAIT!!!! in other posts most people were suggesting hanging a pride flag over your bed, so you wouldnt have to bring it up, and theyd ask for you
