I was talking to someone about not having any gay friends on campus, and he said something like this "well, you're in school to study, not to concentrate on your sexuality". Seriously? The thing is, if I'm ever going to have any gay friends, it will be at school because there is absolutely no way I'd meet any in my home town. Besides, who actually spends 100% of their time at school studying? I just want friends who I can relate to and who I can talk about my problems with without making them uncomfortable, and I've been waiting for that for a long time. I just want what all my straight friends have always had, why should I have to wait any longer? I just feel so left out of life in general... I have almost no one to talk to, and I certainly don't have anyone my age to turn to. I've been venting a lot on EC, but that's mainly because I can't do it anywhere else (thanks for those of you who put up with my rants). No one else wants to hear about my problems... I could never talk about this with my straight-guy friends. Don't get me wrong, they're great friends, but they would just get uncomfortable. I tried going to an lgbt meeting tonight but I guess it wasn't happening. I just feel so hopeless and alone, I thought that it would be much easier to meet other gay people once I moved back to school but I guess I was wrong. I don't even know why I bother trying, all I've been doing is getting my hopes up for the past few years... I just can't shake this feeling of "face it, it's not for you".
lets be honest, sometimes, life sucks. that said, sometimes, life really unsucks too. I found that for me to start meeting other gay people involved local online sites, then at the clubs, then through friends I made at the club, but eventually it grew from me meeting other intelligent likeminded people out and about, through work, volunteering, and straight women, they LOVE to set us up, but their friends are never cute in my case, bum luck and all, lol point being, gays are hard to find sometimes, but keep looking, and the older you get the more of us are out of the closet
My only advice is: if you go through four years of college and only focus on your studies, you have completely wasted a tremendous opportunity to grow and learn about yourself. College is about way more than just studies, your friend is wrong. As someone who is out of college, yeah your GPA is important for MAYBE your first job, or if you wanna go to grad school, other than that most people learn about how do to a specific job when they get hired (unless you wanna be a teacher or in academia). Your personality, work ethic, ability to learn and problem solve and yes your social skills will take you where you want to go. Everyone wishes they were still in college, don't waste it by sitting in the library 5 days a week, but don't fail out either
Keep looking around your community- I assume you've already checked your college for a LGBT group of some sort (?). Many colleges have these groups. If your college does not have any groups, try reaching out further into the community. Are there any LGBT support groups or community centers? Also, check for a Unitarian Universalist congregation in your area as they are very welcoming and likely have LGBT members (UU people do not subscribe to one religion, so you'll likely fit in, provided you are respectful and open minded to all. And, while I've never taken this route and apprehensive about suggesting, are there any gay clubs and bars within a reasonable distance?
You might also look for a local PFLAG chapter and a Metropolitan Community Church. They may be in the phone book.
Even if there were, I'm under 21... thanks for the advice though, I know there are gay people here, but the problem is I don't know how to go about getting to know them besides having some kind of excuse to start a conversation with them, but I'm not really the best at that kind of thing.
