I cannot seem to find anything to make me happy in life. When I was in the closet I felt dead on the inside and so therefore anything I did as long as it wasted my time I was content. Now that I have came out of the closet it seems I am now part of the land of the living again. Its as if everything that I wasn't feeling before has all came to the surface. I've been to the doctor for depression and am currently being treated. I just cannot seem to get my life in order. I am more on the introverted side and tend to spend the majority of my time alone. What do you do to find a passion in life? I feel right now I'm wasting my life away by not finding what makes me happy. It just seems like I cannot find joy in anything I try.
Keep progressing, keep exploring. Even my greatest source of happiness, my spirituality, is constantly altering as I learn more about myself and the world, and you may want to question and develop your own spirituality. Outside spirituality, you seem a bit antisocial -- "introverted" as you say, and I am much the same. Therefor it is harder for people like us to find social contentedness; we must pursue it with effort! The worst thing for you to do is to stagnate, it shall only breed more negativity within you. I am a bit perplexed, however, as to the exact degree of unhappiness you are experiencing. Do you simply feel no joy? Are you being philosophically incapable of joy? What methods have you used to attempt to dispel your gloom?
At the moment I can say I feel no joy at all. I cannot seem to reach a sense of peace within myself. I've been trying to find a hobby to really get into, but its as if nothing seems to stick. I use to enjoy reading novels, playing video games, and watching movies, but now none of those things seem to keep my attention anymore. I would like to find something to feel passionate about, but there seems to be no drive there to pursue things further. I've tried to be social in the past, but it seemed like I was always the one always initiating things. I can never seem to find a connection with people. I want to be someone people enjoy being around not someone ehh take em or leave em doesn't really matter. I'm thinking about taking myself out of the equation and finding some form of volunteering to give my life a sense of meaning.
Good idea! I hope you can find happiness in any such endeavor , and volunteering is an especially rewarding one. If you might relate, my major obstacle with finding happiness is the impermanence of things. As a very young child I remember going to theme parks, riding the rides and eating the sweets. But then I thought, having experienced the thrills and devoured the taste, "It's as if it never even happened, for I no longer feel the rushing wind, nor the delicacies upon my tongue." This led me, I believe, to a strong amount of spiritual faith. This faith does not consume me however, as my natural doubts push me forward with thought. Sort of like an electro-magnetic wave (pardon the terrible simile), the two opposites keep pushing me forward, allowing me to escape despair. Sorry if my advice is a bit abstract.
