So...I've been here almost a month now. I've joined an organization and I'm considering a few others, but I haven't really made any friends. How can I make some friends? What am I doing wrong?
Are you living there or a commuter? What are other students - on-campus or commuters? Are you outgoing? Are you trying too hard or not enough? Are you more of one type as opposed to another - jock, creative, intellectual, preppy, etc.? Are you looking for male and/or female friends? Are you able to access high school friends - that is, if you want to? I made a couple of friends real early on that remained my friends for the whole time. I didn't make that many friends, really, except for a few more as I got more into my major. I think it was because there were a lot of types that weren't on my frequency - jocks, preps, stoners, art and drama types, and tightly wound intellectuals, for example. When you start pulling out broad types, because there's no mutual chemistry, it eliminates a lot of people. Actually, it should make it easier to zero in on who theoretically is friend material. I don't know. I found that I had a lot of acquaintances. Maybe it will happen as you start having classes with the same people. Also, try studying together and that might entail eating together, too, at times.
I agree with tightrope, use studying as a springboard to develop a more personal connection with people. I knew 3 people my first year, 3 new people my second, and by hird year my classes had shrunk to about 12 people. We all got to know each other and one one of our last days together, we all had a huge lunch in the pub. Suddenly, I was talking to people I'd only known casually for 3 years, and it was nice. Proximity and shared experiences had brought us together, even just temporarily, and it meant something to me. Now I'm in my last semester and don't know anybody. I have no idea how I'm going to find social fulfillment after the high of knowing literally everyone in literally all of my classes.
I live on campus and I've tried to engage with people in my classes but no one seems really interested...
Do you have any theories as to why, sort of a broad brush analysis of the situation? I know I did when I was in college.
Honestly, you could start with your roomate. That could be an already built in roomate. I just say keep going to events that interests you. I made most of my friends through my roomates in my classes. I didn't really make friends in my classes until we noticed we ended have the same couple classes.
