Getting emotional and struggling to feel accepted for no logical reason :/

I'm normally a really confident person and don't let things get to me, but the past few days I've really been struggling. I have a great girlfriend who I really love and, really, I have nothing in my life to complain about, yet the last two nights I've ended up crying myself to sleep. I've never been an emotional person so I hate how I'm letting stupid little things get to me now. I don't even have any logical reasons to be upset.

Sorry this might end up a bit long and boring, I just thought writing everything down might help clear my mind. I'm not sure I'll really feel much better for it, but hopefully things will all be back to normal soon :icon_sad:

Trying to figure out what's upsetting me, I've come up with the following possibilities (none of which really seem like valid reasons):

- My girlfriend has been away with friends so I've hardly been able to speak to her for a few days. I try not to initiate contact too much when I know she's busy because I don't want to seem clingy, but it's hard when I miss her so much. In the few days since she's been back, she's been taking ages to repond to texts and doesn't seem in any mood to chat. I know this shouldn't upset me though - I don't expect her to be glued to her phone, she has her own life to live and she has other things on her mind.

- My relationship with my mum has been pretty much ruined since telling her I'm gay (we've always been really close). This hit me hard to start with, but it's been a while and I thought I was coming to terms with the fact we've lost what we had for now. Perhaps bumping into her at the weekend knocked me back.

- In the past I've got upset over the fact that my girlfriend rarely invites me to her house and it always seems to be down to me to ask her to mine. I accept that she may not be quite comfortable having me around when her family are there though and I've felt recently that we're slowly progressing, so it hasn't been bothering me too much. Maybe because I've been feeling down my old insecurities are re-emerging? I just want to feel accepted, and not like I need to be kept away from family. Family is so important to me.

- I found out that my girlfriend and most of our friends have been invited out by a mutual friend, but I wasn't included. Even mentioning that this may have upset me makes me sound/feel really childish and, to be honest, it didn't really bother me too much, but it certainly hasn't helped me feel like I fit in.

I know the simple solution in all cases is just to talk to the people concerned... it's just easier said than done as we're all rubbish when it comes to discussing feelings and emotions :icon_sad:

 

Thanks for your quick, helpful reply dfiant

I agree we do need better communication and I have to tell her how I feeling right now. It's just hard because when things are great (which is the vast majority of the time I hasten to add!) I don't feel I need to start such a conversation and I don't really notice the fact we don't seem to talk about our emotions much - and on the rare occasion I end up getting upset it seems to be when she's a bit distant, which makes starting a conversation about feelings even more difficult! Even in as much as just getting some time alone - I wouldn't want a deep conversation over the phone.

I do feel I may have unfairly represented my girlfriend in my original post. She is the kindest, nicest person I know and would never knowingly hurt anyone. We have lots of brilliant times together, just in the mood I'm in at the moment I can't seem to help focussing on the few things that occasionally upset me Maybe I should have added it's the first time either of us have been in a serious relationship. Overall the last 9 months have been amazing and I've discovered emotions I never knew I could feel.

 

I know I will do my best next time we get some time together