Joining an LGBT alliance in college/telling my roommate my gender?

Just out of curiosity, who is "she"?

Joining an LGBT organization/club isn't about labeling yourself. It's (often) about meeting a group of like-minded people. When I told my mom I might be bi, she told me not to worry about what label to give myself. It was driving me nuts, going back and forth with it. Am I bi? Am I straight? Am I a lesbian? Am I straight with exceptions? Am I a lesbian with exceptions? Not worrying about the label to give myself has helped immensely, but no one in my LGBTQ club has ever asked or expected me to come out and say, "Hi, I'm [insert sexual orientation]". I understand labels can be helpful, but they can be restrictive, too. Simply joining a club will not give you a drastic label. You'll get to say, "I'm a member of X club", but you won't have to label yourself in any way just because you're a part of the club.

As to the roommate problem... I wish I could help, but I've never lived in a dorm, or had a roommate before. I guess it depends on the sort of relationship you have/will have with your roommate. If I were your roommate and you told me that about yourself shortly after we met I would just say, "Oh, okay." I wouldn't consider it information I had to know about you. But that should be taken with a grain or two of salt, as I am a fairly private person.

 

It's amazing what people will accept when they get to know you a bit.

Time and time again, when I've told people what I really am, they take a bit of a puzzled expression and go, 'but you're like...normal!'

Whether you like it or not, most people determine gender by biology. You need to respect this point of view whether you agree with it or not - because so many people have that point of view.

It may well be difficult and confusing for them to grasp at first, because you're challenging everything they've known. Not because they necessarily hate you.

So, be patient and treat them like a normal room mate. If you shout at them or get offended for something they can't possibly know, then that will only give them credence to think you're a freak and they'll likely base it upon the fact that you're gender fluid.

Just respect the fact that they know nothing about you or the issues you face. So don't be angry if they do or say things that don't respect you - if it's out of genuine lack of knowledge. Be patient and use this as an opportunity to educate someone

As an example, I honestly thought goths were a complete bunch of attention seeking freaks. Bathing in goat's milk and drinking fresh blood.
Then I got to know one. I asked questions, and they were answered in a perfectly civil and understanding way.
Now, if i get on a train and see a bunch of goths or a bunch of young guys with all the fashionable trimmings on, as advocated by their TV gods, I will go and sit with the Goths. I feel much more comfortable with them - because from real empirical knowledge, I know them to be civilized, decent people.

All the best

 

I can't answer your second question, as I feel too uninformed on the subject to be of any use. However, the first one, I'll give you my personal perspective on.

I joined my high school's Gay Straight Alliance at the beginning of this school year. I don't regret it whatsoever. I've already met many great, very diverse people. Straight, gay, pansexual, questioning, and more. So far there is nobody LGBTQ in terms of gender identity (who is out, anyway). But still, the group has brought together a lot of interesting people. It's a way to meet others, obviously, but also get support, give support, and maybe even plan events to show your pride.

As far as labeling goes... So far I haven't had any trouble with that. Even before I came out at school, I casually mentioned I was in the GSA to various people to gauge their reactions. No problems there, I haven't seen anybody in a sort of situation where they're being judged for being in the club, really. For being LGBTQ, yes, but for specifically being part of the GSA? Nope.
Although, in my GSA, which could very well differ from many, I was actually asked the first meeting if I was a lesbian. I stuttered, my jaw dropped... I was very surprised. Later someone else asked me again. So someone asking you is a possibility, for sure. But for me, though, the GSA has been a very fun and safe place to hang out. That's really all I can say on the subject. This may or may not help you; my viewpoint is very limited. I definitely agree with what Tzoa said above.

Anyways, I hope everything goes well for you!