I haven't posted about this subject since last year. I thought summer would allow me to cool down and relax, but after being back in school i have this problem again and it has gotten worse. My teacher whom i thought was gay and liked me and all that actually does.. and he kissed me after school after i tried talking to him about it. And to be honest, i am really scared. I like older men but only sometimes. And i liked him. Hes only 23 and hes super nice. But i know teachers are a no go.... and i feel safe. What do i do...?
I guess it depends on the law in your country. He could go in jail for that. So before you decide if you even want to proceed (which I am hesitant to recommend), look up the laws.
I live in VA And i know some teachers here get in trouble by the school for being friends with students on facebook. So i def know i cant have this relationship but im stuck between my "know not to" and my feeling of safeness with him. I need to feel safe..
I am surprised that HE isn't aware about the danger. I mean the moral side of the problem is a thing one can question, but a jail is a jail.
Thats one thing that concers me. Im sure he knows the dangers but why hasnt he just forgotten this whole thing. Not to mention hes a good person. Not a common predator. But thats why i feel safe. He is a good man besides his taste in high school me.
Gee, I just googled VA sex laws... you are quite popular. And not in a good way Honestly, do some research and if the guy is not responsible, you should be.
16 and 23 is quite a big age gap, not only in maturity, but also the vastly different stages of life you are both in. Not to mention he is a teacher and you are the student, which is inappropriate on his part to begin with. Since he doesn't seem willing to call things off and be rational, you need to be the grown up and do it before things get out of hand for the both of you.
Honestly? Go to the cops. This teacher cannot possibly be so ignorant to think that he can kiss his high school student and be on the right side of the law. He is committing a terrible and illegal act and deserves to pay for it. No matter how safe you may feel around him, he is everything but safe for you. Predators have this way of making themselves look safe in order to attract vulnerable victims, who in turn are less likely to turn them in because they rely emotionally on this "safe" person. Please denounce him, he may "just have kissed you" but he could potentially do much worse things to you or others in the future. I'm so sorry you are in this situation. It should never happen to anyone.
This is very serious indeed. I have seen a few situations like this in my school and they didn't turn out very well, with the student being expelled for being in a relationship with a student and the teacher being imprisoned for have relations with the student. A relationship with a teacher is very dangerous. I would recommend waiting until you have graduated to start your relationship. But this is only my opinion and i cannot make your decisions for you. Either way, I wish you the best of luck
In this case, it isn't just the age difference, it is the status difference that's problematic. Teachers are authority figures, and practically every teacher that's ever taught for more than a year or two has had a few students that formed crushes on them. It's a pretty normal part of being a teacher. So you're hardly alone. But a teacher with good boundaries knows not to do anything to encourage the crush, and, in fact, should be equipped with respectful and kind ways of approaching the situation to defuse the crush. There is no possible way this can end well, because there are different laws that apply to teachers than just to someone 23 having sex with someone 16. If you were to pursue it, and he went along with it, it *would* eventually come out in public, he'd lose his job, his teaching license, his career, his reputation, and he'd go to jail. You'd end up really hurt and the subject of gossip in your community. There are entire websites dedicated to teachers who do this with students and go to jail; it's an epidemic problem and always ends up with a lot of broken lives. I'm not sure this warrants going to the police at this point, but it probably does make sense to go your guidance counselor or assistant principal. It's hard to say where he'd go with this, but it's possible that if he has someone explain the potential ramifications of his actions, he'll "get with the program" and be able to clean up his boundaries. It might also be appropriate for you to see a therapist and talk about the feelings... but that would likely involve coming out to your parents, so I understand the concerns there.
You should talk to your teacher about what would happen to him. It would end up bad for not only him(jail, teaching license lost, etc.), but if it got out into the news that you were involved in it, I'll just leave it at your name would come up in gossip and stuff. But if the teacher doesn't stop, tell the cops. It could get MUCH worse. Try telling your feelngs to an adult like a therapist, parent, teacher, etc. who would help you. Even EC can help.
I am seriously thinking about taking this up with him first. Talking and telling him how it is. But if it continues then I'm going to the principle or even the cops. I don't want to cause trouble or be in trouble as I don't feel my mental state could handle it. I saw a ton of helpful advice here. I guess I will post and update tomorrow after I talk with him. Thank you all
