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Not sure where to start?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by fdub, Nov 3, 2013.

  1. fdub

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Florida
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    I've been out for a year now. Mostly everyone knows I'm a lesbian haha. I'm not really ashamed of my orientation but I don't tell anyone I'm a lesbian unless it comes up as a conversation topic.

    I'm one of the only lesbians in my town and I guess a forum is a great place to talk for people who don't have anyone really to talk to. So can I get some advice?

    It's apparent to my group that I'm the "party favor" to the drunken experimental girls that come to have a good and memorable time at the parties we have occasionally. I'm ashamed about taking advantage because most of the girls are drunk when we have our alone time but most of them talk about doing me before they even proceed to drink. Usually, the day after, I find out that it was their goal to hook up with me anyways? I'm a sucker for pretty girls, especially ones that aren't afraid of going after what they want. I always try to find out if they're actually into girls or if they're just out to have fun. Most of them are having fun but they all always say something like "I really like girls, but I'm not looking for a relationship." Bummer.

    Anyways, I know I'm looking for love in the wrong place; but, everywhere in this town I seem to can't find anyone I can connect with besides the girls I meet at those parties. I'm in the South so everyone's very conservative and not open to the idea of being attracted to your own gender (except the curious teens).

    I don't know what I'm asking here, but I just want some advice. 98% of my friends aren't gay and they don't understand anything I'm going through. How would any of you cope with being one of the only gay people in your town? I'm not hopeless. I understand that it'll all happen for me one day but it just sucks haha.
     
    #1 fdub, Nov 3, 2013
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2013
  2. Abbra

    Full Member

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    I know exactly what you're going through, because I live in a small town with a very small gay community that I don't fit into very well. I've honestly just kind of put dating in the back of my mind until further notice. As long as I'm sexually stimulated and able to at least look and flirt with girls, I'm fine.

    Internet dating is also an option for some people, though it's not for me. Maybe you could give it a try though.
     
  3. plisken

    Regular Member

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    Is there any chance you can move to a bigger city ? For work or college ?
     
  4. fortheloveoflez

    Full Member

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    Oh man....straight girls. It tops the charts on lesbian problems. I'm so sorry that you got hurt and feel so alone. I can definitely relate.

    And yes I agree it sucks!

    Hm, let's see. Do you go to college or know of some college around your neighborhood? Maybe there are lgbt meetings or an lgbt club you can go to in these given campuses. Some times I go to cafes that seem a bit alternative and scope the area for lesbians. You may be surprised with what you find. :slight_smile:

    I think you're cute by the way :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #4 fortheloveoflez, Nov 5, 2013
    Last edited: Nov 5, 2013
  5. fdub

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    I mean, the closest college town is FSU in Tallahassee but I don't know when they have meetings. Maaah and the drive is definitely a bummer from where I live. I mean two and a half hours isn't that bad but I don't have the gas to do anything like that! And thank you. :slight_smile: