Hi everybody I am still new here , I am 16 muslim and arabic from syria . my story begins since 2 years When I fall in love with my best friend in the school who I know him from 5 years He is cute and love me so much but the problem is nobody say that he is gay in my country because people hate gay persons :'( . he was like a boyfriend to me but he didn't know that , he thought that I am like his brother . Last year (In the school) they were taking me to the hospital because I said to him tell that u love me ! he said do u think that I am a girl ? and he said u are not my boyfriend </3 . after a few minutes I couldn't breathe and was going to die but they took me to a doctor the next day I told him that I love him and I am gay and he didn't reject me . but he is straight how he can love me ? (that question was always in mind ) . Last year we had a big fight because he wanted me to love him as a friend only and I told him I can't u are my soul mate since this fight we are not talking to each other and I am very sad and lonely I can't study my life stopped he took my heart , soul and mind . This year is very hard because I couldn't change my school and I am with him in the same school and I my heart gets broken every time I see him and when he enters our class I can't breathe any more likely It doesn't need a hospital and It goes away . A lot Experts said that he is focusing on hurting me , why he does that, I love him I didn't hurt him in any way . so guys what do u think ?
Hi there, Miko. Just so you know, I standby in solidarity with Assad, even though the media here has traduced him to no end. Something as essential as orientation can cause problems in relationships, not just in romantic ones, but with regular friendships as you can tell. A lot of people believe the folly that 'Maybe it can work even if he's not gay" but the world doesn't work like that. If you truly want to solve the problem, the best course of action is to give up any hope of having a relationship. Gradually you will lose interest in him and you won't be sorrowful about it. Your friend can't be blamed for not wanting a relationship with you, because he's not gay, an to him it wouldn't be possible to love you like you love him. He's not trying to hurt you, nor is he being inconsiderate. You're the one being inconsiderate, dumping all this on him and expecting him to submit to your demands, all the while not recognizing how selfish you're being.
when u said " I standby in solidarity with Assad " , ok it's ur opinion and I respect it but I don't agree with it . I don't blame him to not loving me I blame him or hate him to keep trying hurting me or killing me If u read what happens when he is near me . I think u don't be believe me but all my friends who know my story (6-7 people) said he is hurting me on purpose ( they are straight !!! )
I'm sure you said all this to him meaning well, not knowing how deleterious and overwhelming it can be to have a gay guy fawning over you when you're straight. From your friend's perspective, it must be intimidating to say the least. The ensuing gulf that's resulted from your confession to him is natural, but what's not natural is for you to continue stalking him or clinging to any hope that you'll be together. As of now, you haven't explained how he's hurting you other than not talking to you anymore. Therefore, I don't know how he's intentionally hurting you. I don't mean to shift the blame to you or to say anything insensitive, but you haven't really said how he's trying to hurt you. The point is you can't blame him for being inconsiderate, evasive, and cold towards you, nor can you blame him for not wanting to talk to you. After this painful experience, I hope you can learn from it, and not fall for any straight guys as it can only lead to bad things happening.
ok I will explain : he knows when I see him I feel very sad and broken because he is not talking to me any more and because I remember all the good times and the bad times , and we are in the same school but in different classes every he comes to my class just to show himself although he knows It might makes me stop breathing and in that case no oxygen is entering which lead me to death . and when I am in the school courtyard talking with my best friend he comes and shake hands with my friend(although he doesn't know my friend and doesn't talk to him usually ) and then go away leaving me broken again :'( , so what do u think about that ? anyway the Differences between my country and other countries in culture , religion , communities make It hard to understand what I am feeling . thank u
I think that if a person of the same gender doesn't love you back then you should at least respect that. If someone you didn't like asked you out, you would probably say no, so he is probably feeling the same way, and constantly going on about it is clearly ruining your friendship, so even though it's hard (trust me on this one) you have to let go of your romantic feelings for him. Occupy yourself with things that make you happy while you recover, and then go and talk to him about not telling anyone about your feelings for him. The reason for this is if your country hates gays, then surely he can at least respect you as a friend and not tell anyone, after all, it's better for your safety. But don't be stressed, just calm down and clear your head, I'm sure this will be fine in the future.
Hi Miko Welcome to EC !! I am sorry you are so stressed out by your friend. Can you try and re-build a friendship with him so at least you are happy in the same room together and you can talk together and he does not ignore you? That would be a beginning ... Then the future may improve also. Your english is very good by the way. did you know there are other EC members from Middle East on EC (Saudi, Yemen, Beirut etc etc) I hope you can meet them. It sounds like gay people have a hard time in your part of the world. Keep posting on EC - we can give you friendship and support
Hi Bingostring thanks a lot u make me feel happy unlike the previous girl :/ . our friendship ( me and my friend ) is done his mother (my english teacher ) want him to stay away from me because she noticed him changing and he started to feel some gay feelings like me (she is homophobic) , and he thinks I am his enemy now . but I won't let hurt me anymore and I deserve someone to love me , protect me form ppl like him , I don't want him to love me or to talk to me at all . I can't w8 till I change my school next year and start a new life and next year is very important because all my academic future is on it . again I say ty u made me feel comfortable , I wish I could find those ppl who are from middle east . Is it possible to find my true love ?? I hope u (Bingostring ) and me be friends :3 .
thanks But the good thing in this person (my crush or who I loved ) is he didn't say to any one that I am gay because before I told him that I make him promise me
