I have the perfect opportunity to buy a *cough* toy online

First and foremost.....read the reviews, solely because they are funny. Haha.

I'd definitely go for it. Honestly, I've been thinking about it too. Amazon is amazing with privacy on most things, so you should be fine.

 

I think you should do it as long as you're almost positive you won't get caught, lol. That would be embarrassing. Also be sure that the Amazon account is not linked to your parents email since they typically send receipts to the email on the account.

As for lube, you can get that at many places locally. I'm sure you should have somewhere that has a self-checkout in case you were embarrassed about interacting with a cashier. Also I'd recommend a water-based lube for toys since it works on virtually any material.

 

That can be a tough one. Try to think of someplace your parents would never look whether it be intentional or just cleaning. Some people hide them in socks at the bottom of their drawer, but that can be a bit risky. When I first bought a dildo, my solution was to buy a small safe and put it in my closet, lol. That may be a bit extreme, but I just couldn't think of any hiding spot for a cock and I really didn't want it to be found, lol. Plus it gave me a hiding spot for future purchases since it had room.

 

A few answers...

I say do it. Tell her you have gifts coming and she shouldn't open anything addressed to you. MAKE SURE you get something that is in plain packaging. When I bought some condoms and lube online at an adult site, the charge and the box was disguised. It was great.

If you want to buy lube at the walmart using self checkout, go in like SEAL Team 6 and grab the bottle. Head out and make your choice as to whether to use option A or B.

Option A is to go and buy a bunch of other stuff so nobody will notice at the self checkout.

Option B is to buy just the lube, and while you are at self checkout, pull out your cellphone and fake a conversation where you make fun of an imaginary embarrassed friend who you are buying the lube for. Tell them how easy it is and how big of a dork they are for not getting it themselves. People talk loudly on their phone all the time.

Hiding is tricky. I usually hide things under the drawers of my dresser. I pull the drawer out and put the item underneath the drawer and laying on the floor. Dressers normally never move, unless you rearrange your room. You could hollow out a book if the dildo is going to be a small one (or get a big book). This will only be good if you have a bookshelf with lots of books. You could hide it inside something if you are really paranoid. My mom had threatened to take away my computer, and since I had been lazy and left tons of porn in the temp folder I took the hard drive out and hid it inside my television. I took apart my TV and put the HDD inside. I placed it far away from the flyback coil or the CRT tube. Be CAREFUL of TVs. They have deadly high voltages inside. That is EXACTLY why I hid the HDD there. My mom would never open a tv. HAHAHAHAHA You might also be able to hide it in the air vent. I have hidden things in the air vent or above the roof if you have a drop ceiling with the removable tiles.

Finally, a mile isn't far to walk for a big bottle of lube. Lube is great. It really is.

 

gimme a break - I am 51 - I only have bicycle , and the CVS is .75 miles away, it don't even bother with the bicycle for that, too much bother to lock it up. You are 16.

seesh kids these days! think they don't have feet!

I walked uphill to school through snow 20 mile both ways 6 feet deep .......

naa grew up in California (*hug*)

another way is a site called adamandeve they send in a plain package but you will have to get a prepaid card or something

 

try sextoys.co.uk

 

I've used adam and eve before and it's a really good site for stuff like that. You could buy all your lube and toys there and the prices are fairly decent! Everything I have bought have come in unmarked boxes and it was very discreet. Even the tag with the description was very generic. (Not sure that applies to you but I was shipping to Canada and it went through customs)

 

Do it! Why not...buy a cheap pencil case (one of the round tube kind) and some pencils and hide it in there. I assume you're not buying anything too enormous that that wouldn't work

 

One thing that can help with the embarrassment of buying lube is buying it as part of a mixed order. That way, it's only one item in your basket, and it can be hidden beneath other items in your basket between the Lube Aisle and the checkout stand.

I envy people who have no qualms about lube purchases. Not long back, I saw someone whom I very casually know in the grocery store who went straight to the lube aisle first, then leisurely wandered the store picking up other things. The lube was clearly visible in his cart at all times.

---------- Post added 4th Dec 2013 at 03:26 PM ----------

Choosing a cashier carefully can also help with lube purchases...

My favorite choice: a teenage/college age guy who looks like he might be a bit socially awkward. They seem to be more embarrassed at seeing the lube than I am buying it...

Worst choice I ever made: an athlete type young man. He took one look, and got the biggest grin. I could read his mind:"He's gettin' some!"

Women generally seem to be mature about the whole transaction.

Another point: buying in a drug store has a plus in that they've certainly seen it all before. One cashier told me once in a bored voice about how she'd gotten to the point of thinking of "condom Friday." Because of how many condoms she sold that day.

 

The under the drawer hiding spot is great, I had a old tin lunch box I used to hide things in under there before I moved out, now it's just the bottom drawer. I've started buying lube and condoms online but only because supermarkets and pharmacy's tend to have a massive mark-up on them.

Realistically it depends how likely your mum is to snoop in your room, I probably could of left everything in my bottom drawer without a problem.

Put them somewhere that your parents are least likely to look (had a mate put them in with his clothes and then spent a few days in hospital, his mum got a shock when she packed his bag) and if you act shifty and nervous about buying things people will most likely act different. Act like you're picking up milk and they generally won't.

 

In reference to your question about where to hide it, the best way to hide things is in plain sight, here are a few suggestions:

1) if it's hollow, put it on a coat hook, who notices coat hooks?

2) Upright it makes an excellent paper towel dispenser

3) Put it in the fridge next to the hot dogs

4) hang a lampshade over it

5) put it in the toolbox...it's a tool no?

 

AHAHAHAHAHA OMG LOLOL. The other ones were pretty funny, too. :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

 

Whoa, I had the exact same idea today, MtnFr3sh. I've been contemplating buying a dildo for a while now, but I'm too nervous to actually do it. Always worried my parents or my brother are gonna be like, "What did you get?" and I wouldn't be able to think of some excuse (I suck at lying). "Christmas present" sounds like it would be the perfect answer, and would be true since it would be one for myself.

 

Adam and Eve has quality stuff. They run some great deals this time of year too. You should look at their website. They have pages and pages of toys. I've seen their brand of lube in the store.

I hid things in a hole in the wall behind a loose toe guard.

 

Yay! Hahahaha

Now your mom is going to say "Geez I wonder why he has such an obsession with getting the mail lately!" JAHAHA

I am almost 100% positive it comes in a plain box.

---------- Post added 4th Dec 2013 at 11:29 PM ----------

By the way, this line reminded me of a quote from Fight Club.

"Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but every once in a while...[whispers]...it's a dildo. Of course it's company policy never to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We have to use the indefinite article "A dildo", never "Your dildo".

Hahahaha, words of wisdom.