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I'm tearing myself apart over my current life/future

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Tyrael, Dec 12, 2013.

  1. Tyrael

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    I feel stuck, trapped in my current circumstances. I live with my parents and I would love to move out. I'm not sure I want to move locally though, risk tying myself down. I've taken on debt which also makes moving out difficult. Such as car finance, which I only have because I needed a car to get to work!

    I don't even know if my company will last into the new year. I am dying to join the police but I am unfit/overweight and I'm not sure if I could even pass the entrance exam. I drink quite a lot and I find it hard not to, life just gets me down so much but it seems like I am running in circles. One day I will break down and hate myself and my life, but then I'll just go to work as usual and won't think about it again for weeks. It's crushing me inside.
     
  2. UIOP

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    Hang on in there, Tyrael. Your life sounds really difficult right now but it will get better (even if that does take a long time). Have you spoken to a therapist/counsellor? Perhaps just speaking to someone about everything that makes you feel bad could help you to get it off your chest a bit.

    One thing which may be on interest to you is potentially buying a bicycle. Can you ride a bike? If so, perhaps you could try cycling in your spare time and boost up your fitness a bit. Perhaps that could make you feel better about yourself? I'm no expert so take my words with a pinch of salt please but could you potentially cycle to work (saving on petrol costs and increasing fitness so you could try joining the police force)? That's just an idea. Don't worry if you can't.
     
  3. Argentwing

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    Thinking about joining the police, huh? That's a topic pretty relevant to me. :slight_smile:

    I'm sure your entrance exam is fairly different from mine in Florida, but as for getting in shape? Just get your heart beating. Get out there and run, making sure you have good breathing and stride techniques. If you do everything right, you can keep a good pace for a lot longer than you think. If you have to stop and walk, just do it for enough time to get your breath back and to let your chest stop hurting, then go some more. Before you know it you will be able to run for long distances.

    Believe me, I am no runner, but just today our academy class had to run for 20 minutes straight (probably around 1 3/4 mile), then run up and back down 7 flights of stairs, then do intense stationary exercises for 5 minutes. I was still beat at the end of it, but do you think I expected that I could do that before starting school? That's a BIIIG "no."

    I know your nervousness over physical fitness is only a tiny piece of the puzzle, but that's what you've got to do: break down your problems into manageable parts. And if you are really hooked on police work, the mental parts will be a breeze. You just can't fall into the trap of self-loathing. Work towards your goals and never half-ass it. Never even full-ass it. If you want something, expect to have to double or triple-ass it. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: It sucks majorly and I doubt myself daily too, but that is what it takes to succeed.
     
  4. Tyrael

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    Thanks for the responses :slight_smile: reading back over what I posted I feel like I'm moaning over nothing. I know my life is much better than most and I should feel lucky just to have a job and a roof over my head etc.

    I would get a bike for work, unfortunately my work is 7 miles away and I can't go into work soaking wet lol and we get lots of rain here in Scotland! :slight_smile: I have started walking and jogging this week so I am doing that instead.

    RSwordsman that's a hell of a work out there. Our fitness test comprises of a 1.5 mile run in under 12 minutes or a multi-stage-fitness-test AKA "bleep test" reaching level 9 minimum. It also includes strength tests separately. As well as the entrance exam covering numeracy, information handling and language. I believe if I lose weight and get fit I will be fine with the fitness, but the numeracy is a problem I'll need to work on.

    As I mentioned I've started walking and will do running (my doctor says I should avoid high impact exercise for now or risk damaging my knee) as soon as my weight drops a bit. Don't get me wrong, I'm not massive, but I am overweight and my knee problem is worse because of it. My doctor assures me it will go away if I lose weight. Anyway my first walk two days ago I covered 3.2 miles so I was chuffed. I plan to do that every day now and and mix it in with some jogging eventually and see how I get on.

    You're absolutely right, I am seeing my life as one big problem. If I deal with my weight first it will make life so much easier, one less thing to feel bad about. I recently watched this video and it really was inspirational I would recommend it. Makes you want to triple-ass it :lol:

    Arnold Schwarzenegger: The New Six Rules - YouTube

    (Sorry for the long post!)