So I had a crush on a young man Adam who used to be my friend. Emphasis on used and friend. Now,two days ago at a school event Adam came back (he's in 9th grade now and I'm in 8th) to visit. So when he entered,it seemed as though he ignored me. Evidence you may ask? Well,my friend was standing right beside me and skipped right past me and onto him,with out saying a word to me,ended his conversation and left. The only time he would speak or even look at me is if I was making a joke about one of the performers. On my way out of the building and on my way home,he hugged me and in a low,sad tone said goodbye. Now I don't know if it's because when he said hello to me I was in a rush and I quickly said hi and he was acting uppity about that or something I did in the past. I now have ended our friendship (without his knowing) and I am dropping all ties from him as of now. Selfish? Should I continue to talk to him?
Well if you want a technical definition then I suppose it is, since it is done exclusively for your benefit, but that doesn't really help matters. It would be more useful for you to consider if it was a good idea or not. Both for you, and your friend. Now personally, if he hugged you and said goodbye, I'm of the opinion that he actually DID want to speak to you...I mean if you're right and he said hello to you and you just quickly said hi and wondered off, even for good reasons, you can see why that might upset him. Personally I would try and speak to him and at least see if he's ok IF you have any interest in keeping the friendship going. On the other hand, you may have no interest in doing so...
To be honest, that seems like a tremendously trivial thing to end a friendship over. If you're going to throw a friendship away that easily, then that would tell me it either didn't mean much to you to begin with or that there is something more driving your feelings here. Are you sure you aren't blowing this out of proportion because you have (or had) feelings for Adam? Before ending your friendship, perhaps you should consider talking to him and asking him about what (if anything) is going on? Could be he didn't even realize what he was doing or had other things on his mind or the like. Or you mention 'something you did in the past'. What might that be, exactly? Do you have some idea of something you did that would have upset him and make him act like this. Anyway, I'd definitely talk to someone who I considered a friend and make an honest effort to salvage the relationship before just ending it based on the scenario you've described here. My 2c worth, Todd
Well,we've had conversations about sexual activity and we have had sexual altercations before (nothing more than a dry hump) but that's all. I mean,to be honest I'm in love with him but that's a tad unrelated I'd imagine. Thanks for the adivice! Elia: Thanks for the advice,I'll try to speak to him the next time I see him,his phone is a bit disabled.
Could you talk to him first and figure out what the deal is? Ending the friendship is a little hasty. I did that to my first ever best friend over something nearly identical and I regret it sorely now >.< AKTodd is on the money.
