I'm down again. Not that I was particularly up to begin with but lately i feel emptier then usually. I find it hard to laugh, I find it hard to be around people and just living through day became hard. I have so many worries, so many questions and doubts and absolutely no one to share them with. I used to be interested and excited about many things like art music poetry psychology… And now I find joy in nothing. I used to read article about any random topic before and get interested in it so much that I would further research it until I could talk for hours about it. I used to listen to music whenever I got the chance to. I used to make jokes and have fun. And lately it feels like all that died. I cannot find joy anymore. In two days it will be New Year and I know where I will be and with who, yet I find the thought of being there boring and tiring. I don’t (can’t) plan what I will do there and I can’t look forward to it since only thing I have in mind is how will I get home and how soon can that be. I’m just completely down and I can’t seem to find the source of it. The worst part is that in a year I will be off to college, studying psychology (hopefully) while being surrounded with people similar to me and I’m not excited at all. I have a bright future yet I see no light in it. Well, there really is no question here, I just wanted to tell this to someone since I really have no one, absolutely no one with who I can share any of this things.
Well even know nobody responded i wanted to because I still think there's something to say u sound depressed and when u said u wanted someone to talk to I think u need a boyfriend bc u didn't say u had one and find one thats full of like who will suck the grey out of u and make u feel good about yourself. I know your probably not even gonna read this because u posted this a month ago and no one responds to me back so I just wanted to right this to u. I hope u won't be feeling this way much longer. (*hug*)
Hi Kuroi, since this thread started almost a month ago already, I hope you are feeling better by now. It seems like you were stuck in a rut and it happens to almost everyone, so its pretty normal. Just think about all the good things you have going for you right now. And be excited for college and all the people you will meet there. That is something to look forward to, right? Also, talk to a friend or someone you completely trust about your thoughts and emotions. Maybe just by talking about it will help you unload some of your burdens. I wish you all the best! Cheers! Cigsmoker [Sam]
Your name means blackness in Japanese. I hope you see the light sometimes. You should look into therapy or medicine or both. I've had depression where even things I used to love were uninteresting. True depression is an alteration of your brain chemistry. It's ok to seek help to fix it.
