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What Should I do with my life?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014.

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  1. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately. I don't know if this comes from age bringing self-reflection, or if maybe I've just managed to stumble across the right kind of people for once in my life. Either way, I've realized where I'm at in life is not where I wish to be.

    The problem is though...that I just really don't know what I want to be. I don't really have any particular interests in anything, and I don't imagine that I'll just stumble upon some sort of occupation that speaks to me or anything.

    I've been thinking really hard about this and I've only got a few particular desires that I really want.

    1.) I want to help people. If I'm going to be working a typical and scheduled job, than I want it to contribute to the world. Mainly because I've learned already in life that I can't use selfishness as a motivator for me...I don't really like myself, and I've never cared one way or the other what happens to me. So if I want to find motivation it's going to have to be through others.

    2.) I want something not too time consuming. I like to relax, I'm not a 'go go go!' personality type. I do my best when I can sit back and think, but more than that I'm not looking to give my entire life away to a job because I want to feel like I have enough time in the day to go out and enjoy myself, or even try and find love and all that jazz. Yes, I'm aware of the disconnect between what I'm saying here and What I said in 1. It makes sense to me in a weird kind of way

    3.) Financial stability. I don't want to be rich, I don't want a Lambo, and I don't want to get outta prison sentences for having 'Affluenza'. I just want enough money to know that if I ever found someone worth settling down with I could provide for them, and save back for emergencies :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    so yeah...that's all I've got. -.-'

    I don't really know what kind of career would be good for me. Like I said at the beginning I don't really have any particular interests anymore...I used to a long time ago, but life has really felt bland and just mundane in every sense for years at this point, and I don't think I'm going to find any new spark of admiration for my existence anytime soon.
     
    #1 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  2. Kasey

    Kasey
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    Look here's the short of it. You need to go out on a limb. Try new things. My life was stagnant for a while until I tried something new, which I think I shared with you on your wall... Or maybe not might have been someone else.

    The point is that everyone is asking the same question. No, not gender, not sexual orientation... But what do I want to do? What is my calling? My career? My mark I'll leave on the world?

    That takes time and it is never too late to change.

    Sounds to me though you'd make a good LICSW if you went to school. Get a practice based on gender and orientation issues.
     
    #2 Kasey, Jan 1, 2014
  3. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    LICSW? What's that?

    Also, I know that. I am really just trying to find some ideas to spit-ball around. Like at the moment I'm working with nothing, but maybe with a couple suggestions to look into I could find something particularly appealing for me ^.^

    I've never really had a strong sense of self, and I'm trying to find that for myself, but I just don't have a good foothold anywhere to get a start at it -.-'
     
    #3 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  4. Kasey

    Kasey
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    Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker.

    A therapist essentially.
     
    #4 Kasey, Jan 1, 2014
  5. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    I've actually always enjoyed psychology, sociology, and anthropology but I don't know how stable and available of a job market the field has :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #5 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  6. Kasey

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    Well most job markets are competitive for the next 5 years until baby boomers start retiring. Point is it is never too late.
     
    #6 Kasey, Jan 1, 2014
  7. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    That's true :slight_smile:
     
    #7 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  8. Tyrael

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    I've been asking myself the same question lately. I'm just about to move into my own place for the first time and it's made me realise I need to move onto a more permanent career. I've watched quite a few videos on the subject of finding out what and who you want to be, trying to get ideas.

    From what I can gather, the most important thing is to discover what you're passionate about. Find a number of things that interest you, even if it's things you'd probably not normally try. And possibly you will find one of those things is what you're passionate about. It's more than just of interest to you. You could be interested in writing, but if you're not passionate about it you'll never achieve your full potential and so it applies with everything else.

    Don't concern yourself with the difficulty of pursuing your passion, don't get hung up on why you can't or shouldn't do it. Just try to identify what it is, and from there you can take small steps towards it.
     
    #8 Tyrael, Jan 1, 2014
  9. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    Thank you for the advice :slight_smile:

    I'm just exploring ideas so far. I've got a lot of things to get sorted out in my life, and this is one of many. My main thing right now is trying to recapture an enthusiasm for life, and I think I'll find it soon, or at least I'm hopeful. :3

    I really just need to get a good list of possible careers and fields of study to sift through and see if there is anything that really strikes my interest.
     
    #9 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  10. AudreyB

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    I have no interest in anything either. At least, not in anything really constructive. I'm a huge movie buff, but film criticism is a debased and dead discipline. I adore classical music, but have no training to play an instrument. All I really care about is being a good husband and father*, but those are really outmoded values here in 2014, as my recent, disastrous foray is a testament to.

    I really wish someone would just rescue me from this charade of a life I live and take care of me.

    *I'm also obsessed with sex and not with any variety that will endear me to anyone of influence in this life.

    EDIT: Sorry that wasn't helpful, I'm drunk right now.
     
    #10 AudreyB, Jan 1, 2014
    Last edited: Jan 1, 2014
  11. Tyrael

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    Well that's just it, I don't think it's as simple as listing careers etc and the field of study you choose will depend entirely on what you ultimately decide you're passionate about. So instead of saying particular jobs, think of particular aspects of yourself like you've mentioned above. Helping people is a good way to narrow it down, but financial security and amount of free time are unfortunately both impossible to guarantee.

    I don't have my own answer I'm afraid so I can't really tell you what you should do. Think about what you'd like to do with regards to helping people. Is that something you're passionate about or is it just something you've told yourself you have to do? Remember just about every career out there will be benefiting someone else somehow. No matter how selfish it might seem. An author might seem selfish because he/she doesn't actively go out and HELP someone, but they're sharing knowledge and the entertainment value with people. So really your choices are limitless.
     
    #11 Tyrael, Jan 1, 2014
  12. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    Trust me I know what you mean. I'm not big on movies, but I'm a huge anime fan, and you can hardly get paid to give your opinions on media lol :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Being a good father and husband isn't a dead trait. It's suffering right now because people are still adjusting to an increasingly technological society, but that's what happens with major changes, it takes time to adjust to a new way of life

    I'm not too obsessed with sex, but also I am idk how to explain this 0.o

    ---------- Post added 1st Jan 2014 at 09:22 PM ----------
    Helping people would be nice, but like I said I'm not particularly invested in anything in life. I'm not even saying that pessimistically. I don't know if I'm just all screwed up in the heard, or what but I've never in my life had any kind of moment in life...every day is the same day no matter what happens...just bland monotony. I don't have interests outside of entertainment and even that's starting to become bland anymore. I've been out exercising hoping that maybe some fresh air would help bring some sense of wonder into this world, but I'm having no luck.
     
    #12 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  13. AudreyB

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    Yeah, it's not even the thankless pay as much as it the fact that no one really has any interest in approaching movie appreciation from a different perspective. If you give them something that's really off the accepted critical paradigm, you get accused of elitism or haughtiness. I used to write film criticism on the internet, but I've given it up because people (film buffs, particularly) these days really prefer dick-measuring to any sincere critical engagement with art.

    It's all relative. The true way to be a good husband and father--at least, I used to think it was--is to put the interests of your family perpetually before your own. To unwaveringly stand up for and stand by moral and ethical values to love and protect your family, regardless of the vulnerable position it puts you in. I now see that that's a fantasy with no basis in reality. The real number one value in life is to protect yourself at all times, everyone else's welfare is secondary. Otherwise, you will always a pariah, abused, and mocked.

    Sex is currently my own reason for living. In a week and half, I have a girl coming over and it's going to be the first sex I've probably ever really enjoyed because it will be completely on my terms. Those terms are weird, but it's not anything I can really help. I am what I am. Maybe I don't belong in this world, but as long I am here, I'm going to try to claim something for myself.

    Again, sorry for not offering support here.
     
    #13 AudreyB, Jan 1, 2014
  14. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    I can imagine. People are more interested in expressing their own opinion and not so much in hearing the opinion of others. I don't care, I personally love a good conversation where two very different people find a strange sort of compromise out of their unwavering opinion of something :slight_smile:

    That is the best way to be a good father/husband. Putting others before yourself is a very postive and worthwhile trait. This current society ( I speak specifically to America here ) has been spoon fed mind rot media and handed the instant gratification of technology. Thanks to this we've lost our way a bit, but I think time will change this because if you look at human history we've gotten less evil over time and it doesn't seem to be a changing trend really or at least I'm hopeful.

    I hope you find something other than sex to live for, but if it makes you happy don't let me tell you what to do.

    For me I have a lot of sexual things I kind of want to explore, but at the same time that they plague my mind constantly I have a resistant nature towards them, and as such I'm pretty stale-mated in that department xD
     
    #14 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  15. AudreyB

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    Simple, I appreciate your thought ful response. Sorry I can't reply with something equally thoughtful, Im prett blotto right now.

    By the way, that should have been "sex is my only reason for living".
     
    #15 AudreyB, Jan 1, 2014
  16. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    It's fine. I don't need every reply to be a paragraph. :slight_smile:

    Like I said, I hope you find other things to live for, and feel free to post to my wall or message me anytime you seem like a nice person ^.^
     
    #16 Simple Thoughts, Jan 1, 2014
  17. WhiteShadows

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    When I read this, first thing that came to my mind was psychologist/counselor. :grin:
    You seem like a wonderful person who can clearly make something work :slight_smile:
    You have more of an idea than you think you do :slight_smile:
     
    #17 WhiteShadows, Jan 2, 2014
  18. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    That would certainly be fun to be a counselor/psychologist :slight_smile:

    I'm glad you think so :grin:
     
    #18 Simple Thoughts, Jan 2, 2014
  19. Kasey

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    So that's two for telling you to go into psychology and counseling.
     
    #19 Kasey, Jan 2, 2014
  20. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    That does make two ^.^

    I'm not sure what I'll do yet. I was actually thinking a lot about this last night, and I realized that when it comes to being passionate about doing something I'd want to be writer. I could also get into programming I think, but at the same time I feel like lines upon lines of code would get really boring xD

    Writing is hardly a paying job, but I think no matter what I end up doing I'm going to be writing as well :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #20 Simple Thoughts, Jan 2, 2014
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