How can I come out a second time? This time being 100% truthful? A while ago, I was in the car with my mother. Something that had happened earlier that day had really upset me. A friend of my mom stated some extremely hurtful and homophobic things. I was crying in the car and my mom asked me what was wrong. The only way I saw I could explain what had happened was to come out to her while stating that her friend had really offended me. That was my plan, at least. I suppose that I...halfway suceeded. I chickened out a bit and instead of coming out as lesbian, I came out as bisexual. At the last moment, I thought that my mom may not be accepting of me if I came out as a lesbian and she may have negative responses, so my brain decided to lie. Or only tell half of the truth. However you choose to look at it. Either way, I guess I did that so that my mother would think of me in a closer to normal way, as in she would still think that I may have the ability to be attracted to those of the opposite sex. For a while I was a little bit more happy than I had been. I didn't completely have to lie to my mother. This probably wouldn't have been such a major issue, coming out again, if I hadn't told the majority of my friends and the person who is now my girlfriend that I was bi as well. Like with my mother, I felt that they wouldn't be accepting if I came out as homosexual, especially because I have actually pretended to be straight for quite a while and I live in a tiny, rural town where there are more churches than office buildings. I didn't really think they would take me seriously. Lately, I have really become aware that it was awful of me to lie to them like that especially since bisexuality and homosexuality are definitely separate orientations. I feel like I have just added to the stereotype that 'bisexuality is just a phase' even though I am well aware that it is not. If I could comfortably come out a second time, being truthful, I would have done it by now but feel that at this point that that would just confuse and anger many of the people I know, though. It's not that I haven't accepted the fact that I am a lesbian but the fact that I am already really pushing it with people's friendliness towards me with sort-of identifying as bisexual makes afraid to come out truthfully. I want to be able to be who I am and do so in a way that would upset the least amount of people. Does anyone have any advice they would be willing to share? I would really appreciate it if someone would be willing to help.
She has shown to be not too fond of homosexuals but compared to some of the people that I have encountered, I wouldn't go so far as to say that she is completely homophobic.
She was quiet for a few seconds before sighing and saying that despite that she wouldn't hate me. I could tell that she wasn't particularly thrilled, though. She still isn't and it seems that she doesn't really want to believe it.
Well if it doesn't seem like she's accepted it yet, maybe you should wait a while before coming out as a lesbian. If she's still uncomfortable with the idea of you being bi, she could really have a problem with you being a lesbian. This way it's kinda like breaking it to her in steps.