I'm not sure if I should be posting this on here, as it has to pertain to a hooking-up issue. If you feel it doesn't belong on this site, feel free to remove it. I've been on MH for almost a month now (friend of mine suggested I join) and I've been having a major problem. They claim to be the "world's largest gay hookup site", yet I seem to be having a problem trying to talk to other guys around my age. I mean, what else am I supposed to say besides a simple "hey how's it goin"? I've hardly been getting any responses. Some of my messages haven't even been read, while most of them have been, but they refuse to respond at all. Even when I want to IM any of them, they refuse to accept. Now, I've even been having a similar problem on ****** prior to joining MH, where no one on there would respond at all. This is putting me in a ridiculous position, as I now feel like an alien in my own area. What am I doing wrong? Am I missing something? Are they just deciding to be so ignorant towards me? I cannot take it anymore.
I've had similar experiences but on a site geared more toward dating than hookups. I'm equally convinced it's because I'm fucking something up, or that they take one look at my picture and click away. Sorry I can't give you much advice, but you should know you're not the only one who feels like this.
Nah your good its just ya might wanna try another dating site and even though they said this is the best for Hookups that's what they all say to get people to sign up.
Hi XtReMeEnIgMa247! I experienced the same rejection on both dating and hook-up sites and yes, it can really take a toll on someone's confidence. I assure you, you are not the only one who has experienced this. You are not the only one who feels despondent because of one rejection after another. Maybe you can try adding a few more statements/sentences when you message someone. Try reading their likes/dislikes and say something about it when you send out a message. I found it effective. Better than a simple hi, hello, how you doing. Guys tend to be more interested if you talk about what they like. It makes them more connected to you. Even if I am not particularly attracted to the guy and he kept sending me messages about art/photography/fave tv show or a movie, I tend to give them a reply and a great conversation pleasantly happens. One good tip I can give you is to have nice photos of yourself. It doesn't mean you hire a good photographer, make-up artists, stylist etc. Just wear the clothes you feel the best in. Comb your hair a little. Get the best possible lighting [outdoor light is really good] and poses possible. And of course, smile in your photos! Last tip that I can give you is to not ask for a chat right off the bat. Message the guy first and try to keep it there for as long as possible until both of you are comfortable enough to chat on IM or somewhere. It might scare the other person easily if you ask to chat right away. Ease him on it. I don't know if these helps, though. I do hope is will. Cheer up! Cigsmoker [Sam]
I message this girl but she never answered back I know how you feel one is truly the loneliest number
Folks, it depends on what you're after. Any of the hookup sites are just that... hookups. With hookups come, pretty much by definition, shallowness, lack of connection or vulnerability or openness, and, often, various other unhealhty behaviors. That isn't the case 100% of the time, but probably a very, very high percentage of the time. Most people won't admit to it because it's too painful. So what this also means is... for the most part, if you're anything less than the exact, shallow, perfect perception that any individual reading your messages or profiles happens to have in his (or her) head... you're going to get ignored. Little to no attention is paid to who you are as a person, it's a very reductionist process focused on simply having a hookup. My best advice, unless hookups are what you're after, is to avoid these sites entirely and instead look at meeting people either on one of the very few quality dating sites out there (PM me for a name, can't say it in the public forum), or -- better yet -- in person at a social gathering for LGBT people, preferably one focused around an activity you enjoy. Hookups aren't inherently bad. But they are usually pretty empty, and it's usually wise to look at why you're seeking a hookup. Simply to have sex for the sake of having sex... is a decent reason. To feel loved, paid attention to, or fulfilled... not so good, because that means that fundamentally, you aren't in a place of loving yourself, and you simply can't love anyone else, or be happy, until you can learn to love yourself. Hope that helps. So when you have
