I just cannot figure out who I am. I have so many nerdy hobbies that will alienate me in the gay community. I have no friends except for my cat.
Plenty of people like nerds. Can any of your hobbies be done with other people? Doesn't have to be together, just in the same room.
I'm not even sure if I can call myself a nerd. The nerd community has become elitist. Most of my hobbies appeal to middle aged slightly conservative heterosexual people, not young lesbian and bi women.
Maybe you just haven't found the right people to connect with yet. Depending on what some of your hobbies are you could try to meet people who enjoy the same thing as you. For example, if you love to paint you could take a class for it and try talking to people there to make more friends.
And not every nerd/geek is the same. Here's my take: Do you like learning? Yes? Then you are a nerd. No? then you are not a nerd. Do you obsess over a piece of media (this includes books) to the point of ad-nauseum where people will demand ask that you stop talking about it? Do you like to play games (any kind) so much it comes to the point where the contents of your wallet is in jeopardy for your entire life? Do you like to go to conventions that have any of the above because you are interested in either one? If you answered "yes" to any of the above, then you are a geek. If none of the above applies, then you are not a geek. Saying "You didn't buy this so you're not a geek" isn't words that every geek says (although I've heard it, and it annoys the hell out of me. If you like something, you're a fan of it). However, if you go to an anime convention and try and cosplay as, say, Robin or Sailor Moon for a reason other than the fact that you are legitimately interested in the actual characters and the universe they live in, it's hard to take that and say you're a geek.
I guess I could make more friends that way. Too bad they will all be straight. Most of my hobbies only attract straight people.
I guess I'm a nerd. I do enjoy learning new things. I'm not really a geek because I'm not interested in cosplaying, comics or gaming. I might just meet a wonderful heterosexual boy and live the heterosexual life because I don't think lesbians and bi girls like girls like me. It only seems like straight guys like me. Maybe I am just a confused straight girl who was meant to marry a straight boy and have two kids. If I turn out to be bi and fall for a guy I will probably just stay in the closet forever.
Just because your a nerd now I think your just giving up hope trust me a few girls will like you and want to be your girlfriend , I like weird things too and I'm a nerd I don't think being a nerd makes other lesbians not like you .
It's not just my nerdiness. I think I'm just too invisible and boring looking to be visible to lesbians or bi women. I have boring shoulder length brown hair and glasses.
I'm probably still invisible. I know that being in the closet doesn't help, but I'm still not secure in my sexuality.
I think your worrying to much but this happened to me , but in time I think you will understand your sexuality and accept it .
Ok, so what are these hobbies you have lol? I'm intrigued. You're only 17, relax. If you want to make yourself more visible, go for it. But stay true to yourself, and only do it if you're comfortable in your own skin.
well... ill be a crazy cat lady with you! i like pokemon and n64 and things like that, but i have found some people who like that stuff to and they are my chums. are there any groups you can join for your interests? even if its online like a forum for your hobbies or something? thats always a start.
I do have rainbow stud earrings, but my hair covers up my ears most of the time. I've heard that some lesbians think rainbows are stupid and poserish. My hobbies are wasting my time asking stupid questions on yahoo answers, making sculptures of my cat, watching documentaries online, reading about psychology online, listening to traditional Nordic music(most people seem to hate that type of music) and finally playing traditional music on my accordion. Everyone who plays accordion seems to be straight and all the gay musicians I know play guitar or maybe piano.
Well, if that's what they think, they can just stuff it. Rainbow earrings are fine, but tie your hair up lol. Ok, so these are not inherently bad hobbies (I watch documentaries, too! They're my favorite kind of movie!), but they sound a bit lonely. Could you pick up a team sport, a club, a sculpting class, or something like that? Take a psychology class at your local community college? And lol about most gay musicians playing guitar or piano. It doesn't mean that the accordion is 'straight'! Haven't you ever noticed that a lot of people play guitar or piano compared to the accordion? You're statistically more likely to find gay folks playing these instruments, simply because they're more popular, that's all!
You never know, you would be surprised to find out that some people are gay and just don't fit the stereotypes that are out there. Aside from hobbies if you are just trying to make friends, your town or the closest big city may have an lgbt youth center in it and you could make gay friends there.
