crying about what he said

Well, your ex-boyfriend is definitely a jerk. I can't believe he would send you that video and say those things; such a cruel thing to do.

Your current boyfriend is not your ex though -- just because he turned out to be a complete dick doesn't mean this guy isn't awesome for you. While I can definitely understand why hearing about this other guy flirting with him might make you uncomfortable or nervous, I think it's a good sign that he wanted to tell you about it. If there was really something going on there it's much more likely he would have tried to hide it.

 

I definitely know how it feels to like someone so much that it makes you sick.

I can't tell you how to do this, but what you need to do is convince yourself that you're already in a great situation -- you're in a relationship with someone you really like who both reciprocates those feelings and has enough confidence in you to let you know when someone else hits on you. He wouldn't do that if he was interested in pursuing that other guy or if he didn't think you could handle it. In his mind, he probably thinks the thought of cheating on you is so ridiculous that it seems like a joke to him which is why he has no problem talking to you about it.

With that said, you can't be with each other 24/7 even if that's what you think you want right now. It's important that you both have some time alone and live your own lives as well; it will make the time you share together that much more special. If you're going to lay in bed at night thinking about everything, it should be with excitement about what you're going to do with your boyfriend next, not devastation about the fact that he's not with you at that exact time.

I know it's much easier said than done, but you're in a good situation that a lot of people would love to be in. Don't make a crisis out of nothing.

 

That's a tough one -- there's no doubt that enlisting in the military will stress and test your relationship. It's entirely possible that your boyfriend will be supportive, but it is also possible that he won't be able to handle a long-distance relationship, particularly since it's such a potentially dangerous job. I have no way of predicting how he'll react; you're very close to him so deep down you probably already have a good idea.

If he's not okay with it, you'll just have to decide which path is more important to you, which I concede would be a very difficult choice to make. If the Army is what you want to do that's a great and noble role, but I hope you don't feel like that's the only option that will allow you to learn the skills you want, provide a rewarding career, or lead to happiness.

Good luck!

 

That is so vile and horrible. The guy that sent you that message is a complete and utter asshole. Please do not let someone that did that to you affect you. People like that are not worth your time. I know it hurts but you will definitely meet someone else. I really don't know what to say apart from what other people say to me and thats "Don't worry". Hopefully you will meet the right person, you just have to give it time, in the mean time keep yourself busy, well try to.

 

Your ex sounds like a huge jerk, and I can understand how paranoid you must be that the same thing could happen again. But I'm sure if your boyfriend loves you he would never make a move on that other guy

 

Wow see y that guy was your ex fuck that guy right. And whoever is hitting on your bf u go right up to that person and say no more hittin on my man! Or Ima punch u in the teeth.

 

your new man is not your ex, which is skum btw. i don't think if he was going to cheat he wouldn't tell you. maybe he doesn't want it to get back to you and you get upset because he didn't tell you. also the fact he is telling you that he's saying he's taken is sweet.

 

Your ex sounds really narcissistic. Those kinds of people are quite often charming and loveable, but turn out to be emotional vampires, just feeding off the attention of having someone care about them. Although it's no doubt extremely painful, be glad that you got out of that relationship. Narcissists can latch onto people and just drain them for years, so it's good that it's just done.

As for the current boyfriend, I would just tell him you've had a bad experience in the past, and it reminds you of it when he makes jokes like that. Do your best to be understanding, try not to make him feel bad.

 

I'm so sorry to hear that. All I can say is that when you finally find the right person I think it will be worth all the pain it took to get to that point. Hang in there.

 

Oh wow, I can't believe he would do that. I'm so sorry. I've been in that position before a few times so I can understand how that must feel. If you ever need to talk about it let me know, okay?

 

Huh...are you sure? I haven't gotten anything.

 

Did you ask him why he wanted to break up in the first place? I really hope he was just in a confused position