I am 17, I go to an all boys Grammar School. So many of my peers are homophobic, so when I make flippant jokes about my boyfriend and I or something like that everyone gets really defensive. I've even lost friends by coming out. I don't really mind this happening to me too much, I can stick up for myself. (I'm 6' 6" and play rugby, people don't generally pick on me.) But I am worried about the smaller people. I am basically trying to find a way of making my school less homophobic. I don't care what it takes I am sick and tired of it. In one of my classes there was a story about a boy. His girlfriend gave him a blowjob, he came, they kissed. In short he swallowed some of his own semen. As a gay male, I have done this on a couple of occasions and I have swollowed from other people. But it scares me that if he got bullied for that, what are they going to say to me and some of my gay friends at school. Does anyone on here know a way that I may be able to start some sort of campaign or something to raise the awareness that there are homosexual people at my school. I really just want them to not be so rude, I suffer from depression and have been referred to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), so I think it would help me if I didn't have to face people like this every day. Thanks guys!!! Any comments would be much appreciated. (!)
I think the fact that you are gay and of a considerable build makes a lot of difference (people call me tall and you have 4 inches on me lol). If people refrain from bullying you out of fear, they may get over it eventually. That low level of tolerance might slowly trickle across into people who aren't so physically intimidating, and you might see a more stable peace between gay guys and homophobes.
Thanks RSwordsman I hope it does work out. I am thankful for your post. I just feel like I should be more active in the whole thing. At least I live in the UK, and its not russia or Ubeckistan (however its spelt)
Well if you want to be active, that's great. I bet you could make even more of an effect doing that. But to me, it sounds hard to be an activist all by yourself. The more people who stand with you, the faster people's attitudes will change.
maybe you could organize a club in your school for you and your friends to help raise awareness about gay. Maybe even have it school sanctioned. there is strength in numbers, and given your considerable build (of which you have 8 inches on me easily, but 10 years younger lol) the other smaller gays will be bound to look up to you, and see you as a prime leader for such a club. also, given your out status as to "everyone" I am assuming your parents know? I am sure they too will be proud of you to spearhead such a task. However please forgive me as I know not the difference between a Grammar school (in the UK) and a High school(US)
Grammar School is like a normal Secondary School (High School) but for people with higher grades. The test to choose what secondary school you go to is made up of three sections of exams. All out of 140 marks. You need 120 or higher in all of them to get into a Grammar. I got: Verbal (Words) 120/140 Non-Verbal (Logic) 138/140 Maths 140/140 And all Grammar Schools are single sex. So, I am at an all boys school. So thats why people are a bit defensive about homosexuality. Hope that clears things up for you Plenilune. ---------- Post added 14th Feb 2014 at 10:27 AM ---------- Sorry for Digressing there I'm worried starting a completely open club may cause more bullying than less. I do have one teacher at my school that is trying to get more attention to gay awareness and homophobia. Ironically she is a Christian. But she believes so strongly in equality, I could confront her? Thanks for the replies already guys!!
Even if you don't start an official club per se, you might do some of the following... A) reach out to the teacher you mentioned. Having a member of the faculty on board with improving conditions can be a big help (at least in US schools). B) be yourself - an out and proud guy who happens to be big, strong, and athletic. that can offer inspiration/courage to a lot of guys who get hit with stereotypes about what it means to be gay all the time. C) educate and rally your straight friends so that they are more comfortable with the issue and will speak out against stereotypes or bullying if/when they see it happening. D) get to know any other gay guys in your school (including those from other backgrounds and with other interests) and see if you can introduce them to each other if they don't already know each other. Just knowing there are others around can help people and this sort of networking can build a support structure for all. If you make some new friends in the process, even better for all of you. E) see if there are any LGBT support groups or community centers in your area that could offer additional advice or support. If so, let the gay/bi guys at your school know so they have the option of using the resource. There may already be a youth group or the like around. Just some suggestions, Todd
Just be you and dont hold back. You've already done so much just by coming out. Just make sure you stay proud. You have nothing to be ashamed of and if you talking about your boyfriend makes people feel 'uncomfortable' then thats their problem, not yours. Good luck and well done.
