Hi, Firstly I'd like to thank everybody on this board, there is nothing more reassuring than knowing that you are not alone. It's 6am and I haven't been able to sleep, I'm in my early twenties, from a Muslim background but firmly agnostic. I live in the UK. I am in the closet and feeling very trapped, just wanted to vent as I felt the pressure bottling.luckily I found this forum. I have never been in a relationship, I'm not massively introverted but the fear of outing my self as gay has been lying in the back of my mind since I was 14. I like many here suffer from depression and social anxiety. My older brother accidentally discovered my sexuality and has largely ignored it treating it as part of my wider mental illness, although in fairness to him he has always been understanding, just not supportive. I prefer to have a few people in my life so am incredibly close to my family and friends (who are very Islamic). The thing is I'm finally approaching the age where people start setting themselves up, a career and a family. I want to have a relationship while I am still young and experience the joy many of you seem to have, hell I'll even take sorrow, just anything other than this heavy loneliness. I'm fairly certain I'm gay but I have never done anything sexual with another guy. I can't date incase I am exposed where it can not only become difficult with my friends and family but possibly violent from the Muslim community I am part of. I am terrified of being exposed. I have two viable options it seems. One is to get on my own place and live away from my family, and live the life of a gay man, with the never ending fear of being found out. Or live my life as a perpetual bachelor, but still being with my family and friends. I haven't slept for a while but please tell me other paths any advise would great. If someone has come out to Muslim parents please let me know how it went. Thanks(!)
