Basically, I am a guy and I have a guy friend who I have a massive crush on. Nobody except for one person knows I am bi. I want to come out to my crush but should I? I've only got on year left of school and besides, I am pretty sure he is straight. I don't want to get rejected and then lose a friend, but at the same time I don't want to bottle up these feelings. Help please?
Is he a really close friend? Only it may be slightly weird if you tell him before you tell your best mates... unless that one person you are out to IS your best mate. I think that you should tell him that you are bi, but don't tell him that you have a crush on him. But only do this if you are pretty sure he'll be cool about it. Then the ball will be in his court, and he can react however he wants. If he is bi/gay/whatever he will most likely react by coming out as well, then things can go from there. If he is straight, this will probably make the friendship stronger because the trust you have given and showed him.
I had (ok, kinda still have) a crush on a guy who I wasn't sure if he was straight. I came out to him but didn't tell him I liked him. He's supportive but straight. I didn't tell him that I liked him, and we've been just as good friends since I came out as we were before.
Thanks a lot. Great first step. Lol, I literally just spend hours thinking about him at night (not like that). I haven't watched any straight porn for days... Still, how can you guys still see them everyday? I bloody sit next to him in lessons and I can't fucking think at all.
I think if you want to tell him, and you don't think he'll freak out too badly, then go for it. Just tell him you wanted to let him know so that you could be yourself. Yes, he's probably straight (and he'll probably confirm that for you too, all the more reason) so be prepared for that. How do you still see him every day? You try sitting next to someone else, you move on, you put up with it, you just focus on the friendship rather than raging hormones... idk xD I had a friend like this and it was physically a problem for me to be near him for extended periods of time.... if you get what I mean. Hopefully that's not a problem for you, although if it is I can give you some tips to help out. Let us know how it goes
He's not any less attractive than he was before I came out to him and found out that he's straight, that's for sure. Before I came out to him I was prepared for the worst: not only would he be straight but he'd realize that I liked him because of the way we joke around, and then he'd stop being my friend. That didn't happen, and I was happy with the fact that he's still my friend.
I would come out to a few more close friends before him, unless he is a close friend. In that case, go for it if you think he'll be supportive. You never know.
What's his opinion on LGBT people? If it's positive, you could come out to him even if he's not one of your closest friends and say it's because he seemed like an open-minded person.
Don't assume telling him you like him will ruin the friendship. You don't know that. I would say come out to him and tell him you like him. If he is straight he will just tell you he is straight and that he is flattered that you like him. I don't think it would change the friendship... It didn't for me when I told my best friend. Ultimately it is your decision but if he is supportive of gay people and you don't think he would flip shit if you said you have a crush on him you should tell him
Thanks for the help guys. I am going to come out to some more people first. By the time I feel a little more comfortable with myself, I may try to confess to him. He is a good friend but I am not sure that he'd like me in that way. I'm a lanky indian guy so I dunno how it's going to go. You've all been really supportive though. Thanks a lot and I will update this thread with how things go.
