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Anxiety about receiving.

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by CharlieHK, Mar 21, 2014.

  1. CharlieHK

    CharlieHK Guest

    I have a wonderful S.O. and because of the gender issues of us both being in the wrong bodies, traditional intercourse isn't going to be happening. so we are going to stick mostly to oral, and mutual masturbation.

    I like the idea of pleasuring her, but the idea of her going down on me gives me anxiety. Like stomach turning anxiety.

    I should note that I have a history with sexual abuse.

    But here's the kicker, she really like the idea of "pleasuring" me. So we are both givers, getting off on the other's enjoyment.

    So I'm stuck because I have to find a compromise and I can't and I just keep getting more and more upset about it because I don't want to push her away.

    I don't even know why I bothered to type this.
     
  2. Hey.I am going through the same type of thing(except without the trans part).I feel it comes down to the history of sexual abuse(I have personal experience with it as well).I may be wrong and if I am please feel free to correct me,it just has had an effect on me in certain ways.I do want to help you out but feel that it is a very sensitive issue and will be better approached through chatting with you privately.I am not a full member though so not sure what to do...So,unless you feel the need not to,is it okay if we come back to this topic through private messaging?I completely understand if you do not want to,I really do.Its just a suggestion and I want to help thats all.Up to you.Hope I did not overstep...not sure whether I should have typed this...I just care...too much.Sorry if I upset you in any way.

    ---------- Post added 22nd Mar 2014 at 04:00 AM ----------

    Sorry.Should not have typed anything.This is probably too close to home for both of us anyway...I overstepped.
     
  3. CharlieHK

    CharlieHK Guest

    I sent you a friend request. I didn't feel you overstepped at all. So if you are still up to it when you're a full member, we can talk privately.

    Thanks in advance.
     
  4. I am still up for it
     
  5. rainmustfall

    rainmustfall Guest

    I wouldn't do anything that makes you uncomfortable. It is a little bit of a tricky situation, but I think as long as you talk openly about it and ensure you are both getting your needs met in other ways it should be ok. Trying to change something like that is difficult, but hopefully you can work something out either way.