My relationship with my family cousins and aunts are rocky on both sides of the family I'm treated like the black sheep but with my mom's side it seems to be a lot worse . My mom always tells me and sometimes even forces me to have a relationship with them and personally I don't want to she always says you never know when you'll face trouble and you many need a relative to help you and when you can't turn to them you'll be all alone . Right now I am all alone no one cares about me , I'm pretty sure I would be treated better by strangers oh no wait I'm a 100% sure because I am treated better by strangers than my own family . Usually my cousin treat me like I'm an annoyance , I feel like if I weren't their cousin they would never talk to me but because we're relatives we have to . In the past when their friends came around and they would introduce me to them they would leave me all by myself and hang out with their friend and it will get bad to the point when they acted like I didn't exist they also did this with other cousins that came over and would even make fun of me with them or insult me to my face with them . I actually found out from another cousin that one of my cousin talked about me behind my back because let's say they accidentally let out the secret . I've been made the butt of jokes for everyone of them it's got so bad I developed social anxiety because of this . The only time my cousins would talk to me if there alone and have no one to talk with or if our other cousins is against them then their nice to me the minitue they make back up they ditch me . They even hate things I like if I like it the automatically hate it , the same with my mom which they both share . I'll give you an example I like katy perry's second song my cousin talked about how she hated the song and it sucked when our other cousin even her friends said they thought the song as cool she lied and said she loved it . This also happened when she asked me to help her shop for a new phone and then she ended up picking another phone someone else told her about and had the utter nerve to insult the one I told her was good . :tantrum: I was thinking wow does my family hate me that much . They have even playing video games with them is not even fun one of cousins would bring a game that I did not know how to play he'll tell the others how to play it by whispering to them but they will refuse to help me when I did not know and when I tried to figure out they would laugh at me . One time I was playing a game with them yet again I did not know because God knows when I figure out how to play the game they don't wanna play it anymore and change it to a new game , when I said wow this game is pretty hard , I heard one of them say " you and I are good at this game , let's team up and lose her because she's stupid " after that I stopped playing with them and just sat back and watched them play because I know for a fact they don't play fair . So I'm sitting here thinking why the heck do I need these people in my life even if their family they make me unhappy they cause me grief and even tried to hurt me . One time my cousins and her sisters and mother tried to gang up on me in a fight they were all planning to come after me and beat me up , I got mad and said " If you wanna fight fine but just know no one is gonna come out unharmed " after I said that they left me alone . I really don't need them their even on my facebook and hardly ever talk to me and the only time they do it's to say happy birthday and that's it . don't get me wrong there are a few I get along with but that's like only 2 of my cousins that treat me decent and the other that a girl that loves me to pieces and is always kind and sweet to me but there like the only ones everyone else hates me I can feel it . I'm pretty sure they will never accept the fact that I'm a lesbian , they even make fun of me for not having boyfriends and stuff and think I'm lame, because I don't drink , smoke or do drugs or party . I'm sitting here think I don't need these people when I have them in my life I feel more alone than when I'm by myself , I'm tried of trying to get them to like me and accept me . My friends treat me like family more than my own family , I even feel accepted by them and they actually like me for me . My mom's always forcing me to get along but they don't want to get along with me and . I'm pretty sure if something happened to me they wouldn't care . I hate the saying blood is thicker than water because it's not , at least not for me my family hates me even my own mom hates me I can feel it and don't tell me oh your mom doesn't hate you because she does and treats me even worse than my cousins . So why do I need them ? I prefer to just live my life and never see them or talk to them hell I wouldn't even miss them . :tantrum:
Family means nothing. NOTHING. You don't keep toxic people around just because you share a relative. It's pointless. All that happens is that you end up feeling worse. You say your mum said "you never know when you'll face trouble and you many need a relative to help you", meaning your are keeping toxic people around for no reason other than you might need something from them later. That's not a healthy relationship its a god damn business venture. Surround yourself with people you care about and people who care about you. You don't need the rest.
