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Need help, first gay date ever

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by johnnyrico, Apr 13, 2014.

  1. johnnyrico

    Regular Member

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    I'm looking for any advice someone can give me, as I believe I'm bicurious and I impulsively asked a guy on a 'date'. How up front should I be, if at all?

    I'm 25 and recently discovered I am interested in guys, although I'm unsure if more or less than women. I've had sex with several women but no 'girlfriend'. Since about 16 I've been self aware of my attraction towards men but the thought of being gay or bi never crossed my mind as I've been able to have strong emotional attachments to a couple of girls. I was under the impression you can be straight and find guys physically attractive.

    Several weeks ago I downloaded a popular dating app on my phone. Sometimes when I was drunk I'd also turn the 'male' search feature on as well as females. Just to see. My curiosity is much stronger when I'm drunk. Sometimes I'll be regretful and embarrassed the next morning and quickly block them.

    This last week I ended up talking to a guy for quite a while, just friendly banter, not sexual at all. Very chill person and pretty attractive. We've been talking all week. He asked me if i was doing anything this weekend and I suggested we grab coffee on sunday (tomorrow). Hitting send on that message created a wave of anxiety but I don't think I am going to flake out. Just talking about it now is making my heart race and my head spin.

    So basically, I have no idea what I want out of tomorrow's meeting (ie. friend, sex, relationship). The thought of divulging even 15% of this information to him is completely out of the question, unless he presses pretty hard. None of my friends and family are gay or bi (to my knowledge), and none of them know I might be. I'm terrified and clueless.
     
  2. Sully

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    Stress less :slight_smile: go grab a coffee, chill out, chat, and go from there. If you're interested in pursuing it more, go ahead. If not? No harm done.
     
  3. LostAndAffraid

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    Agreed, no worries, good luck with it all, don't flake, you are gonna be okay, you know that feeling may be this hint of something genius.
     
  4. Theron

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    Hey, there's just as much of a chance he might not be interested in a second date, either. *shrug* Or maybe you will want a second date. Just go with the flow.