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How do I stop being so fricken sad, no love life.

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by VirtuousSoul18, Apr 14, 2014.

  1. VirtuousSoul18

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    I probably sound like a bitch, but I don't care. I've never been into guys or girls until 13. Went from girls to guys, had crushes now and then, but now it's really hitting me hard. I feel so fat and ugly and every time I read my books (big book reader right here!) and their is a romantic scene, I just want to die! I'll take any advice really....

    btw: have any of you guys read the "Rainbow boys" trilogy? Yes, slightly offending, but the author's gay so we're cool XD. I mean, the way these two guys become boyfriends after different events is just freaking depressing man :bang: I'm such a perv I keep fantasying them.
     
  2. VirtuousSoul18

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    And yes, I realize if I'm not out, I'm alone, but I live in the south. I can't really take that risk just yet.
     
  3. fortheloveoflez

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    You know, some times I struggle with this. I'll admit that. Some times I just really wish that it would be easier to find (in my case) a girlfriend. But it is just so difficult to let alone find a lesbian who I actually like + find some thing in common with. In addition, it is just even harder to have that requited. It takes two to tango.

    I realized though, that a lot of people feel lonely like that. It's OK to feel sad some times. Just let it all out and then you will likely have chance to get over it.

    As for getting over it....I guess what lifts me up out of it is reminding myself that the only person that can make you happy is you. Afterall, it's your mind and you are in control of it. In addition, as another support, people are attracted to people who send off good vibes...so overall, it's kind of like technically you can help every one. That's not to say it's bad to be sad, you know, it's normal to feel at times...just giving some advice if you want to get out of long term sadness...

    ---------- Post added 14th Apr 2014 at 05:48 PM ----------

    Maybe, also, you can imagine your life in the future in a more gay-friendly city. You live in the US? Well, it would be easier for you to move to let's say more gay-friendly San Francisco or New York than it would be for some one without US citizenship.

    I wish you all the best!
     
  4. JessRae

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    I agree with fortheloveoflez. You can't really deny that you and us for that matter will go through this and feel empty and pathetic at the same but it's normal to feel this way there's nothing wrong to even fantasize, we all have feelings and they should meant to express yet at the same time learn to accept that there's a time for everything.

    If the thought of loneliness will occur indulge it and remind yourself after that your happiness shouldn't be depend on someone else. You can be happy by yourself by doing the things you love, go every place you wanted to go, read the books you love really appreciate all the free time. Being alone doesn't mean your lonely and sad sometimes it's just mean or a reminder you have all the time to be independent, to learn new things, to love yourself even more and be better for yourself. Don't go through relationship just because your lonely cause if you do it will never work.
     
  5. fortheloveoflez

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    Nicely said :thumbsup:
     
  6. nikidion

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    Do you have a lot of friends? Hang out with them. Make more friends. Join some clubs or teams or volunteer somewhere etc. The more you fill your life up with people and things to do, the less you'll miss having a love life. Lots of people (especially men) live without dating anyone till college, and they are fine, their lives aren't ruined for ever. I didn't date during my teenage years as well and now that I look back - I was an idiot for whining so much. Believe me, when you grow up you won't regret not having a boyfriend at 15, you will regret not doing things you liked, not hanging out with friends more etc.