Guys, I am seriously at this point where I feel completely hopeless. I went out with my old work group and they all said that they were doing doing things over the Easter break and when they asked me what I was doing I said "nothing". Then they said you have to do something message some friends... This is a problem for me though, because I actually feel like I have no friends. I don't know what to do. I secluded myself from for about 4 years from the age of about 15 -19 and this was mainly because of my sexuality and a few other things. The problem is this was during the last years of high school and college and now I feel like I didn't make any friendships. I feel completely lonely and that I don't have anything to look forward to, I don't even know what to do work wise. I actually just want a group of like 3 friends. What should I do? I went to the doctors and a counsellor and they said just get a job. That is terrible advice as nothing has/did change while I was working as everyone already had a solid group of friends out of work. Alot of people met friends through Uni but I am not going to Uni so it is even more difficult. I just don't know what to do anymore, I try with people and they don't message back or answer my calls. What should I do? I am honestly thinking my life is pointless and I am fed up with it.
I can totally relate to you. I do have a group of friends but I really need new people in my life or else I feel like I'll be alone forever If all I do is wait for things to happen :| I've been talking to my psychologist about it and his advice was to get out of my comfort zone: go to parties/bars and dare to interact with someone that caughts your eye (it doesn't have to be in a sexual way); be a part of local activities on your community; be a voluntary on charity or other things you might like; be a part of a team in a sport you like; make a stage of something on your professional area; register on classes of music, painting...something you like. It is possible you might find that at shares something in common with you, and you can build a relationship from there I registered on the students' association of my college a few weeks ago and I'll be part of a flashmob for charity and a voluntary health program soon. I'll also try to make a stage in another country during next year. I already met new people and I hope to meet more. Don't give up. Make plans and if you want something, go for it, it is possible
Pursue your interests and the rest shall follow. Do what you enjoy, enjoy doing it, enjoy the time to yourself, and while you're out and about, meet some new people. I make it sound easy I know, but it IS doable.
I thought I was going to go through my life without friends. I started making friends when I hit college. This last year is when I made more. I started going out with people more...It has not been easy because I have had to force myself at times, but after I hang out with my friends its all good. Plus, in the beginning I was planning things for us to do and found after awhile I started getting invited. It takes work, but you can do it. Get in contact with people from work and such. Just say hey would you all be up for getting dinner sometimes or hey I hear that this particular moving is coming out you all up for seeing it. Ask a few people and then most likely they will invite others and then you have yourself a group. Now I can say I don't like massive groups. Three is good for me, since I will start getting nervous if there are more. People are nice when you give them a chance. Just know there are some you will not click with and that is just fine. We cannot all click with someone, just the way life goes. You have to force yourself to get to know someone. Just ask how someones day is...People love to talk about themselves so just listen. Once they get a feel for you, you will likely get more invites. Also try initiating it too.
