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Will a therapist tell my mum what I say?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Trentacles, Apr 22, 2014.

  1. Trentacles

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    So my mum is making me go to a therapist / psychology person tonight about my gayness. I don't really want to go since I already kind of talk through my problems here but she doesn't know that. I feel like this is just going to be me staring at the person and not talking but oh well. But anyway my concern is that they'll tell my mum everything I say or at least some of it.

    I've read that it's supposed to be confidential but my mum is the one paying for it and I'm legally still a child so it's like is she the client?
     
    #1 Trentacles, Apr 22, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2014
  2. bingostring

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    Usually a session is 100% confidential. I do not know if the rules for under 16s are different. So you can ask the therapist about confidentially before starting.

    As for 'making you go' that seems a bit harsh. Did she at least discuss it with you ?
     
  3. SemiCharmedLife

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    If your therapist is good, they'll tell you beforehand. If not, as the patient, you have the right to ask.
     
  4. PatrickUK

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    What do you mean when you say she is making me go about my gayness? Do you know who the therapist is or what he/she practices in? Just a little concerned reading that.
     
  5. Trentacles

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    I mean she's tried to talk to me this past week and I've avoided talking to her about anything because I don't want to talk to her. She asked if I would talk to a therapist I saw when I was younger and I said I didn't want to and she set up an appointment anyway.

    ---------- Post added 22nd Apr 2014 at 12:01 PM ----------

    Making me go - I don't want to go at all
    About my gayness - she found out I was gay last week and she's annoyed that I won't talk to her about things. I highly doubt its because of anything else.
    I think he's a child psychiatrist. It's not going be anti-gay camp or anything.
     
    #5 Trentacles, Apr 22, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2014
  6. PatrickUK

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    If he is registered with the General Medical Council (and he should be as a practicing psychiatrist) he should respect your confidentiality. He should only talk to your Mum in very special circumstances, even if she is paying him.

    If you have concerns ask him about it.
     
  7. Kasey

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    Other than life threatening emergencies or endangerment of others (neither of which pertain to you), psychiatrists/therapists are bound by ethics and laws to keep disclosed information confidential otherwise.
     
  8. Chip

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    The issues of confidentiality aren't nearly as cut and dried with people under 18 as they are with adults. At least in the US, it depends on the therapist and on the arrangement. So you cannot and should not assume, without asking, that what you say will be kept in confidence.

    However, the therapist *is* ethically bound to tell the client what the policies for disclosure are, and once those policies have been made clear, then the therapist is bound to honor whatever policies are represented.

    So the solution is to clearly ask the therapist what, if anything, s/he will disclose to your parents (or anyone else), and under what circumstances. If there's any hedging or dodging (which there likely won't be; therapists are generally very clear about boundaries like this), ask enough questions and get enough clear answers until you're satisfied.

    Most likely, if you make it clear that confidentiality is essential, the therapist will honor your wish... but if you don't ask, the default policy with child clients may be different. So always ask and get clarity.
     
  9. Trentacles

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    He seemed alright though i was surprised he wasn't extremely old.

    He said everything is confidential unless I wanted him to tell my mum anything.

    He asked a lot about a lot of things not necessarily gay-related, which i appreciated. He was concerned about bullying, which is understandable considering i've definitely looked better. I got asked a lot about drug use and suicide which annoyed me.

    He suggested i take some meds for my anxiety and possibly depression though i don't really think i'm depressed. he suggested i have some tests done to check for some other things. woo.

    overall i didn't hate it as much as i thought i would.
     
  10. Daniel003

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    I see a phycologist and she always asks if there is anything i dont want her to tell my
    amd its pretty useful cos even though i use ec its nice to talk to some one who it wont affect at all
    And its not that bad any way
     
  11. bingostring

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    Glad it went OK. Does that mean you will see him more?
     
  12. Trentacles

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    Yeah.
     
  13. AwesomGaytheist

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    I don't know the laws in the UK, but in the US, the parent has access to your file. However, any therapist worth their salt knows that you're not broken, homosexuality isn't a disorder, and there's nothing wrong with you. If there's anyone here that needs a therapist, it's your mom.
     
  14. Clay

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    Don't think that's the case here. I assume parents have access to it in the US because they're paying for it, but unless he or anyone else is in danger, this would fall under patient doctor confidentiality in the UK I'm sure.

    His mums not paying for the therapist so I don't think it would be legal for the therapist to tell her anything. I saw one when I was 16, sent there by my mum, and she never told my mum anything.
     
  15. Trentacles

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    Yeah, basically what pluvia said.

    I originally thought my mum was going to be paying for it but i guess it's under nhs but i can't edit the first post so yeah.