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Religion and Sexuality

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by channel4399, May 24, 2014.

  1. channel4399

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    Okay so I am from North Carolina (For those outside the U.S it's a state in the southern region with generally very conservative views). And I was raised as a mildly strict Christian, but when I reached about 11 or 12 I suddenly hated everything about it and I'm not sure why. Now I'm extremely torn because a part of me still resents it but another part finds comfort in it. And after seeing what I was taught proven wrong over and over again I'm not sure where I stand. A part of me still desperately wants to pray and go to church and read the bible but another part of me would burn a bible without a second thought and I'm wondering if anyone hhas gone through something similar or knows a religion that's a nice blend or just has advice. Thank you so kmuch to anyone who responds.
     
  2. Radioactive Bi

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    If you have seen religion proven wrong, over and over I think it's pretty clear the position to take. All religions are obvious man made nonsense and you don't need them to live a good life.

    What I'd suggest though is don't trade one unproven Bronze Age superstition for another. Your use your intelligence, logic and reason and investigate the real world for what it actually is, rather than what a bunch of ancient dessert dwelling goat headrest thought it was.

    Remember, religion is a choice whereas your sexuality is an intrinsic part of you. One of them is true, the other is not. I'm sure you can figure out which one.

    Happy days :slight_smile:
     
  3. phoenix89

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    Hey Channel

    I know exactly what you are talking about. I am going through the exact same thing and it hurts like hell. I was recently burned by a church event and I am still trying to recover from that. I have quit attending church, I quit attending Sunday worships on Feb. 23, I did got to a women's weekend on Feb. 28-Mar.1 and that was when I was burned. I have not been back to church since then, I did attend an open and affirming youth group which helped a great deal, but not enough for me to keep my faith.

    I am currently take a break from my faith. I lost my ability to believe a week ago tomorrow. You do not have to get to the point of not believing, but for me it was the best option. This gives me time to heal, emotionally, spiritually and physically (I have had stress hives for three weeks). I want to desperately hang on to my faith, even though it is actually too late at this point. When I feel that I have recovered enough from all of this I am going to try again, but I am going to go every slow. If you feel that taking a break from your faith, then do so. You do not have to tell anyone if you do not want to, but know that it is easier when you talk it out, and we are here if you want to talk about it. When it comes to something like this, it is important to have a support network. It is very difficult to do on your own, I have done it before about 7 years back, and now here I am doing it again.

    If you want to keep your faith, which is wonderful, trust me it is. Then it is important to try and find an Open and Affirming Church. These places are great and are amazingly accepting of the people from all walks of life including the LGBTQ+/GSM. They have in their mission statements, that they are accepting of people regardless of their sexual and gender orientation. A good place to look up information on Open and Affirming Churches is Gaychurch.org. In addition, the Episcopal and United Church of Christ are Open and Affirming on the Denomination level as well as many of the churches on the local level, these are some good churches to look into. If need anyone to talk to or just want to vent, know that we are here for you and will always be here for you.

    Best of luck my friend,
    Becky
     
  4. channel4399

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    Thank you to both of you. Radioactive Bi I see your point but I don't think I'm ready to fully let it go yet. Becky thank you for your kind words and sharing your own experience. I think I'm going to take you advice and try and find an open and affirming church since I'm not sure how strongly I want to keep my faith yet or what I truly believe in.
     
  5. Toast

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    Personally, I believe in the possibility of a God, but I'm not entirely certain I am able to comprehend the existence of a higher power. I'm not a very religious person, and I don't like religion in general, but that's mostly because I've seen it used over and over as a good reason to kill, discriminate, and hate someone for being different.

    But I still love to go to church.

    My pastor is a wonderful man. His sermons speak to everyone. He doesn't take the moral high ground, and instead admits his own faults and when he teaches, he seems like he's teaching himself too, which is a really hard thing to do without looking fake. I don't necessarily go to church because I believe in the faith. I go because I agree with the morals and most of the values, and because the church is a community, like a second home.

    You don't have to outright reject your faith. There are pros and con's to religion. How you react to religion should be based on whether you think the pros outweigh the cons.
     
  6. PatrickUK

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    It's not about Christianity, it's not about Jesus, it's not even about God, it's always, always about the Bible. The Bible says this, the Bible says that... if you don't agree, you're either a heretic or a fool, so they say.

    I don't think there is anything wrong with taking the Bible seriously, but we find too many people (atheists and conservatives strangely enough) taking it literally, as though it's the latest Dan Brown novel. It's an incredibly naive way to read the Bible, but it suits both sides well when they decide to point score and kick lumps out of each other, or some other poor soul who doesn't quite fit their world view.

    It's possible to embrace religion and sexuality within an open and affirming Church and that's what I would recommend. It might not be the denomination or tradition you are most used to, but that's not always a bad thing. You're more likely to experience real Christian values of love, tolerance and respect within one of these Churches and your doubts will not be slapped down with anger and disdain. Give it a try.
     
    #6 PatrickUK, May 24, 2014
    Last edited: May 24, 2014
  7. mangotree

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    It sounds like the religion you were born to got you in touch with your spiritual side, which is a great thing!
    Don't let it stop there though.
    I would recommend reading/listening-to as many books about spirituality (as apposed to religion) as you can get your hands on. Some of them, you'll read the first chapter or the synopsis and realise it's not for you, others will "make more sense".
    You don't have to believe everything they say though. No author/spiritual-teacher has ALL of the answers for everyone. Just find the missing puzzle pieces.
    There's too many books, teachers and authors to list here.

    Feel free to learn about theology and "alternate histories" as well - they can be quite fun. One of my friends has a room full of (non-bible) books just about Jesus. Think along the lines of the Da Vinci Code but with a bit more research.

    Peace be with you.
     
  8. Wuggums47

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    I'm a Christian, and I personally believe that human sexuality is a divine gift, and I'm sure a lot of people would be upset that I think that. I don't think it matters who we have sex with, just that we love those people wholly and completely. However I also think that if someone else wants to have sex with people they barely know, it's not my right to tell them they're doing it wrong.

    I personally am a Catholic for personal reasons, but a lot of my thinking is more episcopalian. Episcopal's perform gay marriages and have female priests and deacons.
     
  9. black-cat

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    Do whatever makes you feel comfortable. By the sounds of it going back to your religion would be bad, due to the fact that you have proved it wrong. Pick and mix whatever you need to feel comfortable, happy and safe. Good luck :slight_smile: