Few years ago I broke down with bad depression and was pushed into seeing a psychologist, so I went a few times, didnt like having to relive past experiences, and talk about stuff and she kept bringing up an incident from my past, so I didnt stay in therapy for long. But during one session she said I may be a sex addict. so my question is where is the line drawn between a healthy sexual relationship and being considered having an addiction? My thing is I love sex and do not think that I am. So maybe someone with some experience in the area, can help me understand the difference between healthy and addiction. Also is masturbation a sign of that?
When I think of a sexual relationship with someone I think of two people who regularly engage in social, emotional, and physical investment with one another. A healthy sexual relationship is not random hookups every week, or where one partner is abusive to the other. Also, masturbation can be lumped into this sexuality issue as well. So, how often do you masturbate, how often do you have sex and with whom?
Well, I like to have sex over masturbation, but my wife isnt always wanting to, she says im always horny, and gets irritated over the frequency so I usually end up masturbating for release. Until she lets me know when she wants to have sex so of course I take that when I can get it, and I have learned just not to push her or anger her by constantly trying to have sex. I masturbate at least few times a day. Maybe more if im off that day, but really depends on what my chores are for the day.
Okay, so you have a high sex drive. I would reduce the masturbating down to once a day. This will free up time to do other hobbies. But, as long as it isn't interfering with your regular life, then it shouldn't matter too much. Does your wife not want sex at all or to get penetrated? Perhaps she can jack you off, or mutual masturbation, and this will be an intimate time between you two without full on sex. But, if she doesn't want to then don't.
Forgive me, but I have a bit of skepticism when it comes to the whole sex addiction thing. Quite frankly, there just does not seem to be enough evidence to suggest that it is a real addiction: a term that is thrown around WAY too much now adays. However, I do recognize that sex can be a bit of a bad habit depending on the circumstances. A few things must be considered: Is your sexual desire/activity (including masturbation) interfering with your life? It's okay to have a different level of sex drive than your partner, however, if your activities are causing you to miss work or engage in risky sexual behavior (such as activities in public places), you might want to consider trying to tone it down a bit. Are you using sexual activity as some sort of way of coping with a problem in your life? I'm not talking about occasional "stress relief". If you are using sex as a way to ignore or avoid an issue, be it a relationship problem, or issue at work, then yes, your sexual behavior is a bad habit. Is your activity/dersire causing any adverse health effects? Fairly self explanatory, but if your... skin... start tearing or you forego food in order to fill your desires... need I say more? If none of these apply to you, you are Probably fine. Lots of people have high sex drives and have a good life. P.s. As an interesting tidbit, it is suggested that those who have sex more often generaly DO have a higher sex drive as a result of it, or at least masturbate more. Go figure.
I think I do use sex to deal with some issues im having, not sure that its a real problem yet, just considering it may be just overactive sexdrive. I havent had any major issues with anything as a result. It seems to cause the occasional problem with the wife, but Idk, the frequency and creativeness vary from week to week. I think I deviate from the norm as far as sex and masturbation go, and sometimes worry about that. I just get these urges to feel pleasure and take care of my needs. I do sometimes have to relieve myself in public, but more private public places if that makes any sense. It very well could be related to some bad things I had happen when I was younger, but Idk, Its got to the point I just dont think about it, I just do it.
