Grrr. This is so weird. I am in admiration of this girl I know, and although I'm gay, I don't think that it is a sexual attraction. I just wish that I could more easily distinguish between the two. I am so scared of rejection that I don't even let myself think of liking anyone who is not openly gay, and I am overly precocious of not being "perverted" around people who know I'm gay. But this girl. I don't think that I like her, but that it is more of a matter that I want to be her. I am a runner, and she is a teacher at my school (only 25 and I'm 17), and she was my town's best runner...ever... she made the olympic trials for her first marathon at 22 or 23! She ran at a D1 school that won the NCAAs (3 times during her career) for XC, largely in part due to her. I'm a decent runner (best in my town now), but compare nothing to her. She lost her mom at age 13 and is one of the most optimistic and happy people that I have ever met. I found out that she lives right near me, and she suggested that she could run with me sometimes during the summer! I have never been so excited! I barely know her, but she intrigues me, and I secretly have stalked her previous races since meeting her and I am in awe. Would it be weird to ask for her phone # so we could meet up? I think that I just really want to be her friend lol. I mainly run alone because I'm the fastest on the team (by quite a bit) and having a running partner would be a dream come true. The age gap is a little wide, but enough that I think we could still run together. Gahhh. I don't get why I'm so excited or why I'm sharing this but I'm so happy. :icon_bigg
It's cool that you met a really remarkable person. Unrelated, but you should try to pay rejection no mind. It's not half as bad as not having an answer at all. I bet she can give you some great insight into running and other parts of life.
Haha thanks, its just weird. I'm finally (mostly) out, and now I don't know how to meet other lesbians being that I'm young and can't (won't ever) drink. This girl just reminds me of someone at my church who is actually her age that I adored and loved like a big sister, and miss greatly since I had to leave my church due to homophobia and we lost contact after she moved to Israel/Cambodia/Iraq/Vietnam for missions. I guess this girl is like an idol for me (like loving the top college athlete of another sport), except I see her everyday and she is willing to help me. eep. Happy people make me happy.
