1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

How to bring up homosexuality in conversation?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by falcenav, Jun 30, 2014.

  1. falcenav

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2014
    Messages:
    57
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I want to try and gauge my friends feelings towards homosexuality, but I don't know how. I'm and introvert and I rarely talk much, so when I do talk, people are going to see what I'm talking about as important. So I'm scared to just bring up homosexuality because they'll focus in too much on me and get suspicious.

    My friends are soccer player guys, they're nice people, and they've made subtle gay jokes before. Nothing outright homophobic, but they're teenagers. They imitate/mock gay gestures, make sexual sounds that should not be made, etc etc. They rarely do this, though.

    I'm more focused on one of the person's reaction, because I've really considered coming out to him. He's always been friendly to me and has supported me when people are mean to me. (At lunch last year, this one kid would always pick on me and get on my nerves, and this friend would always retaliate at him...I don't know how to describe it, but he definitely was trying to protect me).

    So how can I bring up homosexuality in conversation without it getting awkward or too focused on me? I see my friend I want to come out to only at soccer practices/trainings. Rarely see him anywhere else. I'll see him maybe 2-3 times a week.
     
  2. Thewitt

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2012
    Messages:
    88
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I would try and use a celebrity who might have recently come out.
     
  3. asdfghjk

    asdfghjk Guest

    isnt there some famous soccer guy that came out or anything, can you bring that up in a remotely smooth way like "so this guy was tellin me about -soccer player- bein gay yall think thats legit?" and just see how they react. Remember they may not know how to react either and are waiting to see how everyone else does too, and might say or agree with things they dont fuy support, if guy you are specifically wondering about doesnt seem supportiveit may be better to try with him alone another time because peer pressure wont influence him.

    just my suggestion idk >:
     
  4. Tardis221B

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2014
    Messages:
    312
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    West coast U.S.
    I have the same issue with not knowing how to bring it up. It just seems so out of the blue to bring up in conversation. What I've been thinking of doing lately is talking about a TV show with LGBT representation. Then you could go from there, and gauge his reactions.

    Best of luck :slight_smile:
     
  5. RainbowGreen

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2013
    Messages:
    1,442
    Likes Received:
    44
    Location:
    Québec
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I find it funny because I never really seem to be able to do it, but my crush does it all the time xD. He just says something like ''I wonder why the gay flag is the colors of the rainbow'' and stuff like that out of nowhere, and I just stand there saying nothing xD.

    There's not really a subtle way to make it come up. You could bring up a celebrity that just came out or just a news story relating to gay stuff and see their opinion on it. At least, don't do it like my crush and crash in with LGBT stuff out of nowhere that makes everyone go :confused:
     
  6. Really

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2014
    Messages:
    2,579
    Likes Received:
    753
    Location:
    BC
    Last Tango in Halifax from BBC. Season 2 just started on PBS in North America.
    Know it? A bit of drama, a bit of comedy. Quite entertaining.

    I agree a tv show is very easy to bring up and talk about.
     
  7. scanner007

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2012
    Messages:
    278
    Likes Received:
    0
    Falcenav,
    Sounds like it's time to "invent" a gay cousin. He's about your age and is coming from out of town to visit and will be staying at your house. He sent you an email letting you know he was coming and in that email he also told you he was gay and hoped that wouldn't be a problem.

    You haven't really seen or talked to him much over the past few years since he lives so far away but when you were younger you used to hang out all the time when your mom/dad's brother/sister still lived in town and he didn't act gay or anything back then. (That way you come off a bit ignorant and stereotypical on 'the gays' without being offensive. ... lol)

    So now you're not sure what to say or how to reply to the email and you need some advice. And so you can ask someone for advice and gauge their responses safely because you're not talking about you...it's your cousin. A cousin who you can invent as complete of a backstory as you need including a name and far away state where they live, but your friends won't ever be able to meet because he's only staying a few days then he's going back home. (Best to base this person loosely on an actual relative or real person you know if you can so if people ask you random questions like a sports team in that state or they ask what town he's in cause they have a relative who lives near there for example, then you can answer questions accurately and sound more convincing. And of course they have no Facebook account because it got hacked and now they hate facebook )

    From there its just a matter of saying,
    "Hey guys you know any gay people? My cousins coming in town next week and I don't know what to do" (for example)

    Hope that helps.
    Good luck!