I went to my friends house yesterday for a party I've done nothing rebellious or teenagey in my short life and I've started getting really bored so my friend, a responsible drinker my age, had a few girls over for some light drinking. No one had hangovers, no one was sick, it was all just mainly for the buzz. I had 5 vodka cruisers and was good the next morning except one sharp pain when I woke up then I was all good for the rest of the day. Everyone was drinking except anyone who would be driving and it was in a safe environment with people I trust. However, I didn't tell my parents there would be drinking at this party. I love my parents its not really even a rebellious statement, it was just something I didn't really want to say They really trust my friend and I don't want this occasion to stop them trusting her because the drinking was controlled and everything was fine. I'm okay with them not knowing but I feel a little bit bad, but also feel terribly anxious about not telling them anything about it as they think the party was just a whole bunch of girls sitting around watching movies which it kind of was, but instead of movies it was music and vidka,. I should point out this was during a sleepover at her house where it was very obvious everyone was drinking from the parents so it was cook by them and I am 17, nearing the end of high school and coming up in my 18th birthday. I just felt like I need to be doing more things I want to do, and if I went to an actual high school party, I probably wouldn't tell my parents everything that happened there either. Teenagers don't tell their parents everything and I don't want to make it a big thing, I just want to do my own thing with people I know are safe to be around and kind of spread my wings I guess. I'm sorry if this isn't very coherant, please leave a comment if something else needs explaining. Any and all feedback will be helpful
If i were in your place, i would feel very nervous honestly. I know My parents would be ok with it, and probably annoyed i didnt tell them so they knew beforehand. Ok no totally ok, but they wouldn't be angry at me. My mom told me it is ok, just that i tell them so they know, and that i am never afraid to call them to pick me up or anything if i Get drunk or have noone to drive me home. It isnt like you did anything wrong, yeah under legal drinking age i suppose, but you are responsible and if you dont want to tell them it is no big deal. But you know your parents The best, and in case you decide to drink later on as well, it could be a snart thing that they know, so if you ever Get in an uncomfortable situation or have to walk home ect. You Can call them. I feel like i'm stupid to give this advice since i'm younger than you, but OH well. Thats just what i think.
I don't see why you'd have to tell them if you don't want to. Just because they share your genetic information does not mean you're obliged to tell them everythin you do and to seek their approval for your actions. Especially at your age. It's your life, your choices and it's quite frankly none of their business. Don't let them guilt-trip you into obedience anymore, they are also mere mortals and not everything they think is good for you actually is, because they're not you and they're probably biased based on how they were raised etc. I think you should become more independent, especially mentally. Stop caring what your folks think and start caring about what you think.
I wouldn't tell them if I didn't have to. If something went wrong because of it, then yeah you'd have to explain the situation and they couldn't be mad at you for the truth. But in this case, there's no reason to throw it out there unless you really feel guilty about it.
Being a parent of a 20 and 15 year old, I do have a perspective on this. If one of my daughters told me what you did, I wouldn't be thrilled (and I mean when the 20 year old was younger, she can do what she wants now), but I would have been proud. My reaction would be different for the 15 than 17. At 17, you're almost legally an adult, but 15 is still quite young. If they are this honest with me I would feel like I could trust them and it would give me security to know that if something bad happens that they may feel comfortable telling me. I would also have a lot more respect for them if they told me. After they told me this, and then asked to go to the same friend's place or another party, I would feel more comfortable letting them go than if I didn't know what was happening or I let imagination go wild. My 20 year old was always quite open, and she would say who drank what and who did what, and etc. She was around your age at the time, and by then, what am I going to do? She was almost on her own by then. She'd say she was going to friends or a party, etc. I'd say have fun, be careful and drink responsibly. I knew she would because I trusted her. I guess it depends on how your parents are and how you think they will react. If you think they will be very upset, I wouldn't, but if you think they may be ok with it, I would. Communication is a excellent path towards trust, and it shows that you are responsible. But, this is my perspective as a parent, I do remember being young
