I know i should see a doctor and I am on the waiting list but I'd like to have some sort of idea of whats going on in my head. When I'm in school i feel really stressed, but its not about the work as I'm doing pretty good in class, it's the crowds of people and the noise. I also get like this when I'm shopping whether it's for food or clothes. Another thing is if I'm invited somewhere in advance I will certainly decide that night I'm not going, no matter when it's supposed to happen. But when I was meant to be going to my friends birthday and I wasn't letting myself not go , i got really panicked and later ,when talking to family, realised I'd had a panic attack. Finally when my friend got me to go out with her and friends i had fun while I was there but when I was heading home I began to become paranoid again that they all hate me and mock me. When i finally got home i just wanted to crawl into a ball and cry and then sleep and never see anyone again. It drained me so much that I slept for so long. Because of all this i obviously spend a lot of time alone or with family, but I get very lonely as I used to have a fairly active social life and do enjoy spending time with people I trust. I know this might seem a lot but I'm honestly unsure whether I have social anxiety or if it stems from trust issues and paranoia ?
Hi HooLoo, my eldest daughter is your age, and she went through a phase that sounds very much like what you are describing. For example, we went to the museum one day, and although she loves science and all the interesting things there, she wanted to leave just because of the crowds and the noise. We ended up going to a library in the city instead, sitting in a silent hall and reading for an hour or two, which she preferred. Regarding not even wanting to go and hang out with friends (ie in 'social settings'), she had that too for a while. So it could just be a phase you are going through. But by all means get some help, personally I recommend counsellors such as psychologists rather than psychiatrists, because the latter can tend to be too quick to prescribe drugs (which have side effects, some of which can be harmful), when just talking about it with a qualified counsellor can help (this is what has helped my daughter to overcome most of it).
Thank you so much for replying, knowing that this mightn't be a permanent thing is really comforting as it really depresses me some days. I think I am being referred to a children's councilors but I'm not sure of specifics as I only know that my GP has sent my notes to them.
Your story sounds a lot like what I go through, and though I've never been officially diagnosed with social anxiety, I know I have it, even if it's just mild. I also become nervous and uncomfortable in social situations and hate large crowds, especially in shopping centres. I always feel like I'm in everybody's way and it makes me anxious, and I just want to get done with whatever it is I was supposed to do and get out of there. So yeah, to me it sounds like you do have social anxiety. You're not alone! (&&&)
I've got a lot of problems with socializing, in the middleschool (I mean 11-14 years) I was so terrified by the idea of going to school that I feel sick everyday. I also have demophobia.
My layman's view on this: it gets better after the teen years. Part of the anxiety you feel should disappear as you enter adulthood; it has been shown that the adolescent brain processes embarrassment differently to adults or children, and that physiologically, teenagers are much more predisposed to discomfort when being watched by others, especially peers. However, it may be worthwhile nevertheless, in this case, to seek help from a mental health professional...
Social anxiety *does* stem from trust issues and paranoia, so there's really no separating those things. I have social anxiety disorder and experience many of the same things you've mentioned. Though your symptoms don't sound severe they do sound troubling and it would probably be a good idea to see a psychologist or therapist to talk about these issues. It's possible it is just normal teenage angst, but it could be a bit more than that, too. I ignored my problems for a long time, and that only made them get worse, so I think in your case I'd recommend going to see someone about this so you can work on it now, rather than letting it develop into something more. It's easier to change your thought patterns while they're still developing rather than to wait years and years after you've become set in a certain mind frame to readjust your perspective.
Thanks for all the great advice, its only been over that last few months and I'm waiting to see the doctor but it's nice to know people understand
