It is really difficult to put what I want to say into words But to say were I should begin is the hardest part. Well i'm GAY and I am nearly sick of just sitting around waiting for the right moment to come out to my parents or at least some family members that may or may not help, hell even my dads girlfriend I would come out to. But there is a problem my life has literally revolved around me hiding this it took me up till 7th grade just to tell my friends and be open to a school of course I was given shit for it but it was never a big deal surprisingly. In 8th grade everything went downhill so I ended up around the end of the year being framed for a "gun threat" I wasn't the most popular motherfucker in the school so the principal or something said I was an anti-social freak but I digress. Over the past year or two I ended up being a nervous wreck and a bit more suicidal than I had ever really been fucking with amphetamine salts, cough syrup or anything I could find left over from past prescriptions and anything I hoped I could overdose on. Around the time I was done with court hearings I got to go home. My mom suggested I live with her cause I didn't want to live with dad anymore so she got custody and signed me up for homeschooling which I still haven't finished, eventually after 3 months she kicked me out because I was fed up with christianity. My dad just recently got custody back its is now soon to be august. Over the year I had been taking downers prescribed from my therapist that my mom hired because she wanted me "fixed" But All of that's finally over besides me possibly being held back to 9th grade. I want to just be able to have some sort of closure to move on to get something off my chest. But there is another problem, my mother is a homophobe which I remember told me ages ago if I was gay she would want me locked up she is christian and conservative as hell and of course she is in this mind set that she is above most christians and only makes argument about on the subject of being gay she and as much as I would like to rant about her she is still a loving person just in short terms really fucking twisted. My dad feels it would be a shame if I were to be gay and of course thinks its a choice. BOTH think lgbt people are brainwashed and convinced they aren't born that way and deceived and sick . My mom side of the family has many lesbian relatives and of course she acts like she knows everything about homosexuality because of it I mean I even had to explain to her that the reason my lesbian cousin went on hormones and shit was because she was Transgender and shit Then I had to explain to her the difference between hermaphrodites and trans people SHE thinks that gays and lesbians are mentally scared by molesters and shit and that being gay is a drug and.. :bang: Of course my father is an apologetic that thinks religion and jesus are two separate things and that bill o'reilly is a fucking genius.. I just cant even like explain anymore because its just fucking ridiculous you would even think it was a JOKE. But the reason I say those things I because I just dont know what to do anymore I just really dont. I feel if I were to say I am gay the first thing that would come to mind for either of them is buttsex and I say that as honest as I possibly can. I am at a loss of words. Sorry if this thread or post whatever it is is too long or in the wrong spot or something even if this story was annoying and long I just need a way to vent or get some help or whatever. Thank you so much for letting me waste your time. :smilewave ---------- Post added 21st Jul 2014 at 11:52 AM ---------- I just realized my grammar in this post isnt very good
Don't you have emergency services around where you live? Over here, kids in your position would be usually made available for fostering, after a care order is place. Other than that I'd recommend putting distance between yourself and them. It will hurt even more when you're older if you keep too attached now.
