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Day=Ruined (Dumbass Friend)

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Polterpup, Jul 29, 2014.

  1. Polterpup

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    OH MY GOD! Ya know, I was having a pretty decent day after reading why people had to say on my last post thingy. Legit, I was like "These people are right. I need to just calm my tots, (I don't like saying "tits"...) keep working on my music, and just...relax. And I thank everyone who gave me advice! Seriously, it's really appreciated! But it only took that ONE person to ruin it all. My ex boyfriend. The story behind us:
    Was in a relationship with him. Discovered I was gay (don't much care for the word "lesbian" either). Ended the relationship. We are still really good friends. Well, WERE good friends. So he and his girlfriend (who is also one of my best friends) are having relationship troubles. Obviously, she comes to me because I'm the most trustworthy of all out friends. Tells me she doesn't know if she has feelings for him anymore and all that good junk. So I start talking to him. He tells me he's giving her time to think and that he hasn't had the best of luck with girls. Obviously. So I tell him that maybe they just need to take a complete break from the relationship for a bit. And he tells me that they've only been dating a month. So I said "Maybe you're not providing something she needs". He was all like (mmm...like my teenage dialect?) "If I'm thinking the same thing you are we both agreed to wait a while, she thought it would be good." Of course this brought a smirk to my face...because I hadn't even thought beyond the whole "not providing what she needs" thing so I replied with "Because obviously that's what I was thinking. Because obviously I'm always thinking about sex. Don't assume things." This is where I got pissed...well, first really upset. Like, legit tears came from my facial region. Then I got pissed.
    "You are always thinking about sex. That or Mario (I didn't say WoY because you look up fanfics, and that includes sex)"

    Oh. Dear. GOD. How did he not realize how incredibly hurtful that was?! Sure, I'm a bit of a perv. But does he really think I devote my entire life to sex?! That everything I do is related to sex, right down to what I read?! And then he proceeds to get MAD at me because I told him that was incredibly hurtful and that I didn't want to talk to him right now! How wonked up is that?! He shouldn't screw with one of his girlfriend's best friends. I mean...she IS coming to me for advice on what she should do about their relationship. I could be like "Yo, you should leave his sorry ass. He's no good for you anyway." Eh...I'm too nice to do that. BUT HE SHOULD REALLY WATCH IT! Some people aren't so nice. My day, er...night is ruined-oh, look at that! He just texted me saying that he was only kidding and he meant to put a "lol" in there! He needs to learn that...you just don't say some things. Whether or not he meant it to be, it was extremely hurtful. Now I feel like some kind of sexually needy whore! Ugh...dumbass...
     
  2. silverlining7

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    Sounds like you did the right thing talking to him about his girlfriend-your friend. I think he was trying to use a comic relief and it went horribly wrong. Maybe the both of you misunderstood each other and that's where the perverbiale poo-poo hit the fan. I also think he should learn how to use comic reliefs better. I hope your night gets better, lord knows how hard it is to try to sleep pissed off and upset.
     
  3. mangotree

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    You probably feel better just from writing all of that out and maybe reading it back to yourself.

    I didn't realise until the end that it all happened over text message.
    Text messages - more than any other written communication - often seem to end up in miscommunication. It could be worth while giving him the benefit of the doubt. It would suck to lose a friend over something that happened via text.