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Why are men so cruel to women?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Budweiser, Jul 30, 2014.

  1. Budweiser

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    Can't walk home alone at night, can't have a taxi go directly to your house, can't go on a date without telling someone exactly where you'll be, leave drinks unattended, we don't even like to use the bathroom alone half the time. Even just smiling can be viewed as an invitation for more. Rape is often blamed on the victims, so even the smart guys who have their lives together make it a fucking nightmare.

    Is it human nature? Is it the way we bring boys up? Both? I don't get it.
     
  2. Hexagon

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    My guess is that human nature has many aspects, and that society can bring out different ones. Modern society tends to bring out the worst. But don't misunderstand me; people who rape, be they men or women, are bad people who've made bad choices. A man who rapes doesn't do so because he's a man, and saying so makes victims out of the very people who are committing the crime.

    That said, men are responsible for the majority of rapes, and I'm ashamed of that. Sorry.
     
  3. stocking

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    Not all men are bad or cruel to women but what you listened there is so true , My smile has always been taken as so we're boyfriend and girlfriend now , or Your mine
     
  4. BelleFromHell

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    I think it's both, but mostly upbringing. Misogyny, while not as bad as it used to be (except in places like the Mid-East and India), still abides by the same logic it did thousands of years ago. Men were taught to be tougher and be the ones who do the hunting and fighting. Women were taught to have children, stay at home, and don't assert herself to a man.

    Women were taught to be ashamed of their sexuality, and that their sexual organs only existed for reproduction and the pleasure of a man. Right before WWII, Japanese geishas would have their "mizuage" (virginity) auctioned off to the highest bidders. She would have no say in who she would sleep with, and if she dared to lose her mizuage before it was bought, she was considered valueless. It's not surprising that, during that time period, there was A LOT of coerced sex (a.k.a. RAPE) going on. To this day, people still see women's sexuality in an odd light. If you want proof, take masturbation as an example. Male masturbation is talked about much more frequently than female. It's seen as the norm and a step on the path to "becoming a man" (the same can also be said about men when they have sex). When a woman masturbates, it's considered abnormal, perverted, unladylike, amoral, sick, and deviant. This is why men usually start masturbating at a regular basis much sooner than women do.

    If I told you that my mother has never mentioned the word "masturbation" to me once in my entire life, would you be shocked? Probably not. Hell, I just recently found old papers that my mom saved for me called "Teaching our Daughters About Sexuality". While it doesn't say a word about non-PIV sex, it does mention "the m-word". The fact that she even OWNED something with that word on it shocked me. Just recently, I was helping the mother of a friend of mine give her "the talk". While she did mention anal and oral sex, the only oral sex she talked about was fellatio (she didn't mention cunnilingus). And, not so ironically, she did not say a word about masturbation. I, personally, believe that if masturbation was added to "the talk" more often, there would be less teen pregnancies and STD spreading. If a girl is taught that she can realive her sexual tension on her own, she'll be less likely to be sexually active at an early age and less likely to sleep with someone who she does not want to sleep with just for sexual release.

    Though anyone can commit rape, cisgendered men are much more likely to commit it. Like I said about women's sexuality being shamed throughout history, it's the same thinking that had lend men to think that it's OK to have non-consensual sex, as long as the male is being satisfied. Men are taught that their sexual needs are much more important than a woman's, and that can lead to rape.

    I can go on and on, but I think you get the point now. Now, if you don't mind, I'm off to my league of feminazis where we will plot male genocide and take over the world. (kidding, do people really believe that shit?)
     
  5. returningflame

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    There's a rule in science. For each and every action, there is an opposite.

    What i mean by that is Men are cruel to women, but (and from ALOT of personal exprience) women are JUST as cruel to men, albeit in different ways.