Hi everyone. In a few weeks schools will begin in my country.its my final year and the most dificult of all. When I think about school I get ultra anxious! I have social anxiety disorder and im a coward. I survived last years but now everything is getting worse. There is a prom and a school trip lasting lots of days. However if I survive this year school will be over forever but worse things are about to come. I have to find a job and in my country I have to serve in the military. Im so scared..any advice??? I have to see a therapist.... (im 17 )
Well, as far as I know you aren't required to go to prom or class trips. You don't have to go if you're that uncomfortable. If you are required to go on the class trip, just pack plenty of entertainment. Pack some books or magazines that you've been meaning to read. Pack a crossword puzzle or something to do. Bring a sketchbook and some pencils and draw a lot. Draw things from your class trip. At first when you get a job it'll be scary with new people. Once you get to know them you'll feel better around them. There are plenty of jobs where you don't have to directly work with people. I know you won't like to hear it, but you might just have to talk with people. I had social anxiety and I really wanted to get past it, so I forced myself to say something to someone around me. I asked my teachers stuff I already knew just so I could get past it.
Yes im not forced to go to prom or school trip. But I have lost 3 school trips from past years and my friends think im crazy becaue im not going to them. My parents always say how fun school trips are and after lots of years shool trips will be the only thing that I will remember from my school years. (Sorry for my english). Thank you for the reply.
Woah, breathe. First off... Don't call yourself a coward. You're not a coward, or else you wouldn't be trying to solve your problems. Being scared and being a coward are two different things. A coward just runs, they run from their problems, their friends, their family, people in need, without even thinking about the situation or the person in need. Being scared is a normal and natural thing. Everyone gets scared. My advice is go on this school trip. Stay close to your friends and focus on your friends and conversation. If you don't want to go to prom don't go, but don't not go because you are scared. If you are scared, go. In regards to the military... Military life is a huge adjustment but if you do what is expected of you (without whining and complaining or falling out of runs, slacking off when everyone else is just trying to make it, going to sick bay at every injury or feeling of sickness)... You will make it through the military fine. Really. It's that simple. Do your job, maintain your respect from others by not complaining, falling out of physical exercise drills, group runs, keep pushing yourself. Pull strength from those around you. If you get smoked, get smoked, don't take it personally and carry on. You will earn respect, self-confidence and more if you can do that. Don't take anything said in the military personally. Seriously, they are all just as scared as you are. I'll never forget the conversation I had with my brother about when they were about to unload into Iraq during the prime years of the war. Everyone gets scared. Becoming an adult is deciding what your actions are when you get scared. ---------- Post added 20th Aug 2014 at 10:36 AM ---------- Also, listen to this a bunch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2hRTLdvdnk
I think Ada is right. You are definitely not a coward. You are just dealing with social anxiety which can be very limiting. Social anxiety is really unpleasant You mention a therapist - is that a possibility? They can help teach you on how to improve social anxiety. They can talk you through steps of dealing with it so you do not feel so bad about it. Military - is that 100% compulsory? It could actually be a great time for you and meeting new people and being forced in to situations that will help you lose the anxiety. (*hug*)
