Should I just accept that my Dad doesn't think I'm gay and pretending I'm Straight. There's a part of me that wants to fight, but there's a bigger part of me that's tired of fighting and should just accept this as fact, especially when my the majority of my family are telling me I'm overreacting and that it's my fault. I feel so weak.
How long ago did you come out? It can take parents quite a while to accept that their child is not straight, and he could just be in the denial stage, but eventually he'll come round. I'm guessing you don't have a boyfriend right now, but I expect that when (and if) you do get one, and you introduce him to your Dad, and he sees that you are happy being gay, he will finally accept it. It's not easy when your family don't accept you for who are, but I doubt he intends any malice, and he's just taking his time to adjust to the idea of having a gay son. (*hug*) I hope he finally comes round. And if he doesn't, who cares what he thinks? A Dad should love his son no matter what, and always be supportive and accepting, and if he doesn't accept you for who you are, then he's not a worthy father, in my opinion.
He's from Nigeria, and if you know anything about that country, you should know what he thinks. It was my mum who outed me to my Dad, and now I'm made to feel guilty for it. She forced my Sister to tell Dad (My sister is Bisexual). I came out to my Mum a year and a half ago, a big mistake to say the least. My mum outed me about 6 months ago, which sent me into a horrible spell of depression and suicide. My Dad threatened to kill me if I ever said I was gay again. I was made to feel like it was my fault through an entire week and I nearly jumped out my window. I tried to run away, and that's when things started to get real bad.
You are in a very difficult situation at home and the most important thing is to do whatever it takes to cope and survive. If you have to maintain a low profile and avoid conversations about your sexuality, so be it - I'd rather you do that than end up in an even worse situation with your parents. I wouldn't go as far as pretending to be straight, as that can damage you too, but can you avoid the issue? Remember, one day you will be able to live independently with the freedom to be the real you - it may seem like a distant dream right now, but it will come. I'm concerned to hear about the depressed feelings and attempted suicide and the threats your Dad made towards you. Can you tell us any more about the attempt to run away... what happened to make you consider this and where did you plan to go? Is it something you are still thinking about? As you are in the UK I would like to recommend Childline to you. If you find yourself in a crisis situation get in touch with them to find out what options are open to you - ChildLine It's free and confidential and you will not be judged. If you need a place to be yourself do come on here and talk to us. You don't have to pretend here and we care about you. (*hug*)
I'd packed a few bags to run away with, my Mum caught onto what I was doing very quickly, and she stopped me. I told her exactly how I felt and she then told Dad as soon as I got back. I was going to live at either my friend's house or my sister's house. My dad called her a stupid bitch and said he was going to drive down there to tell her to mind my own business. And the rest is history. I came out to be a stronger person...for a little while. Now I feel empty again...
