Not sure if I'm bi or lesbian? :/

So I'll try to make this as short as possible but thank you all in advance who take the time to read this and give advice.

I've always liked girls ever since I can remember. Back when I was 13 I was gang raped and I stopped really looking at girls after that and just guys. But I wasn't looking at guys for a relationship, I would look at them and say "wow hes hot, I'd have sex with him" and that's all I ever did. I've never been in a relationship with a guy, its always just been sex. I could never get emotonally attached to them.

Well 9th grade I met this amazing girl who changed my life. My very first girlfriend and the love of my life. My only serious relationship. We ended up breaking up because my family started to find out and I wasn't ready to tell them. That was the main factor but there were others as well. Anyways, after we broke up I went back to doing the same thing with guys, just sex. But I never wanted a relationship, I just forced myself to want one. I talked to girls and followed lesbians on Instagram but never initiated anything because I knew my parents won't approve. A few weeks ago I just got to my breaking point because being with a guy makes me so depressed. Being with a guy does not make me happy. and tried to kill myself, but obviously that failed.

So a few days ago, the girl has came back into my life, and it feels so good. I feel happy again. I'm going to marry her. Sounds crazy maybe, but I love this girl. I've never loved a guy the way I love her. I've never in my life loved a guy at all. So when she came back into my life I started questioning my sexuality again. I know I like girls, I could always see myself marrying one. But idk if my liking for guys is fake because I'm forcing it or if I just don't give them the time of day because of the rape incident.

I know I don't need to label myself but I do want to know. I just really need some advice :/