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Psychiatrist - first visit...

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by shinji, Sep 29, 2014.

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  1. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Decided it's about time to go see a psychiatrist, so i called this one guy i was eyeing who is supposedly the best one in the city... turns out he's on vacation until the 6'th of october.

    Seeing as how i am a very calm, patient and rational person, i quickly googled the next one i could find, called, made an appointment for like an hour after said call, and off i went!

    So i went there... some apartment near the city square. The guy was obviously single, around 45~50 years of age, had this "snobby" vibe to him, rich, and seemed quite homophobic. This was i all gathered from the first sight of him.

    So he invited me, i sat there and he told me to wait... Guess he had to go to the bathroom.

    So he comes back 5 minutes later and asks me "what seems to be the problem" and i'm like thinking "where the F do i begin..." So we stared at each other and i tried to start...

    Okay, to make this short, basically i told him a lot but, as i was speaking i could see that he was simply not "connecting" with what i was telling him. On several occasions he actually tried to steer the conversation in a "general" area that i think he could have been more comfortable with. It's strange to explain, it's like, he wanted me to fit into a certain "mold" that he has already created and that kind of ruined it for me...

    Anyway, so i spoke a bit about this forum and about my depression and stuff... So he told me that, apparently i wasn't depressed but was just suffering from social anxiety. This was after i've told him about how i wanted to kill myself when i was 18 and how i got over that and then how the next 3-4 years i cried myself to sleep etc... Anyway, i did feel some relief after speaking to him but... it was kind of... like talking to a complete stranger. He just didn't understand me.

    Constantly trying to tell me that i was being anxious because i was afraid that people will find out i'm gay... Bitch i wear a fucking rainbow bracelet, i want people to know i'm gay... Seriously!

    Anyway, he "prescribed" (quotes because, turns out it's not a prescription drug but supplements) these:

    Neolexan - which is 5-Hydroxytryptophan 100mg - 2 per day.
    Melatonin Ambrose - which is Melatonin 5mg - one per day.

    And apparently i'm supposed to take these for six months (just FYI, they are very expensive!). Also he told me to come and visit him in three weeks.

    So i'm kind of angry, confused and... disappointed and hopeless right now. Will wait for the 6'th of october to go and see this other guy and maybe get this Paxil thing that Bubblemonger keeps recommending.

    Also, fun fact! So i told him about my panic attack on friday (post is here somewhere in the forums) and he was like... "yeah, seems like you had a panic attack, so tell me more about blah blah blah..." And he completely changes the subject. Always going back to my parents and stuff...

    I want to be able to talk to people, to find a boyfriend and be happy... damn it! I told him this and he was like, not phased at all... like talking to a wall.

    Also, get this, i told him that i wasn't sure if i was gay or bisexual and he was like... "yeah, all gay people are bisexual, it's just that some have a preference to men"... WHAT?!!?!

    And this is supposedly one of the better shrinks in the city... I sure as hell hope that other guy is better, if not i'm soooo going to self medicate.

    I don't know, maybe i seemed "too normal" and he got the wrong idea? I mean, i was quite comfortable talking to him... Was not shy or anything, maybe that got him the wrong idea. And i swear! Every time i told the word "gay" i could see him flinch a little...

    Apparently he has had previous patients with "similar" problems, as if that is supposed to make me feel better. He started explaining to me how normal it was that i wasn't interested that much in sex and more into the emotional aspect of a relationship... His words - "Yeah, sure, many gay people actually seek comfort and a platonic relationship, and sex just comes later"...

    Okay, i'm done venting, opinions anyone?
     
    #1 shinji, Sep 29, 2014
  2. Starfleet

    Starfleet Guest

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    Seeing a psychiatrist: Good

    Seeing *this* psychiatrist: Bad

    Shinji, I've had cable-tv service guys that cared more about me as a person than *this*.
     
    #2 Starfleet, Sep 29, 2014
  3. resu

    resu
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    Yeah, he's an idiot if he thinks all gay people are bisexual. Try another guy who is more LGBT friendly. Also, he doesn't seem to be a real psychiatrist (they are supposed to have medical degrees, which may be why he couldn't prescribe you real antidepressants). Anyway, don't let this bad experience get you down. Look for a mental health counselor that specializes in cognitive behavioral therapy. That at least has been shown to work just as effectively as drugs (and working best in combination with them).
     
    #3 resu, Sep 29, 2014
  4. Chip

    Chip
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    I'm sorry you had such an unhelpful experience. Sadly, that is more the norm than the exception when seeing psychiatrists, at least in my experience in working with them and in talking to others who have. I'm glad you were at least able to get something out of the visit.

    For the future... I can't reiterate this enough: If you're having issues such as anxiety, moderate depression, confusion about orientation, difficulty with relationships, a psychiatrist is not who you want to see. Psychiatrists are medical doctors trained to diagnose and treat serious mental disorders. They are at their best (to the extent they are competent at all) in dealing with schizophrenia, psychosis, and the link... conditions for which medication is either primary or one of the only reasonable treatemtns.

    For most everything else, including mild-to-moderate anxiety, depression, confusion, relationship problems, etc. psychiatrists (on the whole, with a few notable exceptions) are generally a terrible choice, because they are generally not trained as therapists. And in the therapeutic interaction department, they tend to range from decent (rare) to downright terrible (entirely too common, unfortunately.) Additionally, because they get little to no training in diversity, nonjudgment, and other crucial aspects of the psychotherapeutic relationship, they can be completely ill equipped to deal with things outside of their mainstream (such as homosexuality, fetishes, nontraditional spiritual beliefs, and the like.)

    The one good piece that came out of this was the advice to try 5-HTP and melatonin. 5-HTP has been shown in several studies to be as effective or more effective than conventional (and far more powerful and addictive) medications in dealing with anxiety. Melatonin is more of a general relaxer, often used to help with sleep, and for that, it seems to be pretty effective. Valerian root (from the plant used to make valium) is often also helpful.

    But to actually solve your problem rather than band-aid it with supplements or drugs, I'd suggest trying to find a psychologist or clinical social worker or counselor to help you. That will likely give you much more positive results.
     
    #4 Chip, Sep 29, 2014
  5. Celatus

    Celatus
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    He sounds like an asshole, find a different psychiatrist, it doesn't mater if he's the best, it matters if he or she actually CARES about you. I have a female psychiatrist who is a very good person. Also, it seems as if you need a medication for more than just depression. Let's just get this straight. You are DEFINITELY depressed and that guy can stuff is homophobic remarks up his ass. I cannot recommend the medication I take enough: Paxil/Paroxetine also treats social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder, something I struggled with for years: Paroxetine - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    Also wtf is Neolexan? I looked it up and it seems to be some kind of Russian SSRI.
    Holy shit he's STARTING you on 100mg of it TWICE A DAY?! Do NOT take that quantity of medication, I repeat DO NOT TAKE THAT AMOUNT OF MEDICATION. 200mg is WAAAAAAY to high a dose to start on. Almost all proper psychiatrists start their patients on 20-50mg to see how the medication will affect them before increasing the dosage. Trust me SSRIs are NOT meant to be taken in this quantity, it will produce some serious noticeable unwanted side effects. I suggest cutting the pill in half and taking ONE HALF (50mg) a day for at least a week. I mean, who knows, that Neolexan stuff he gave you could help. For now, stick with the Neolexan he prescribed you except take a half pill once in the MORNING EVERY SINGLE DAY for around two weeks. Then and only then stop and find another doctor if you don't notice any difference.
    Finding the right doctor is a method of trial and error. I've run into quite a few who are just plain arrogant jerks.
     
    #5 Celatus, Sep 29, 2014
  6. TheStormInside

    TheStormInside
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    I'm going to echo Chip and tell you to seek a psychologist rather than a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists tend to be more medication focused, whereas a psychologist is generally more what you think of when you think of talk therapy. It's possible you could benefit from medication, but it's a better idea to have a few sessions with a therapist/psychologist to better assess that.

    Is it possible for you to find an LGBT friendly therapist? It sounds like this guy has little to no knowledge about gay issues, so if that is part of what you are seeking help for it would make sense to find someone versed in this area. I've been seeing my therapist for years for anxiety, and I'm fortunate that she also specializes in LGBT issues and is gay herself. I recall seeing a counselor back in college who was absolutely terrible, however, and wanted to put everything in my life back to issues with my father (Freud is dead, dude! Move on..) So, yes, this can be rather hit or miss. Hopefully the next guy is more helpful for you, but if he isn't, don't be shy to continue to look for someone you mesh well with.
     
    #6 TheStormInside, Sep 29, 2014
  7. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Okay so then what is the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist? Because this guy i visited described himself as "psychologist / psychotherapist". I'm going to look for a psychiatrist tomorrow, but not quite sure what to expect. I'm not exactly what you would call "rich" so... can't really afford to spend too much money on long treatments and stuff. So i somewhat got my hopes up about this Paxil thing but... i don't know. Talking might help, or so i hope, i did feel quite relieved after i left this guy's "office", but didn't last long.

    After reading this... i'm now kind of scared to even start taking these... Seems like the Melatonin was something i could have easily skipped and saved myself some money. No idea why this guy would "prescribe" it. This other thing that is 100mg, well, the apothecary did look at me kind of strange but, didn't think much of it, now i see why. So, from what you have been saying i should be okay to just go to a psychiatrist with ONLY the request that he prescribes Paxil? Because i asked this guy about it and he was adamant that it was something that didn't meet the requirements and was not going to do me any good at this stage.

    Problem with my country is that... it's kind of lacking in most things already present in other more advanced countries. This includes LGBT support groups, info etc... Like, as a crude example, if you looked for something "gay" specific, you'd only get a bunch of recommendations for gay clubs (of which we have like two in the city, i hate my city) and a dating site or two. Kind of hard to explain but, simply put i can't specifically search for a therapist by a criteria. On a side note, considering i'm a guy, would it be more comfortable to talk to a woman or a man?!
     
    #7 shinji, Sep 29, 2014
  8. TheStormInside

    TheStormInside
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    Regarding the melatonin, I've been taking this for a really long time myself with no negative effects. It just kind of calms my mind a bit to help stay asleep. I take 3mg a night. Here in the US it doesn't require a prescription, it's over the counter. I think you should wait until you see another psychologist and talk to them before you start taking anything this first doctor prescribed you, though, as he doesn't sound very qualified :/ .

    Sorry resources are slim for LGBT people in your country :frowning2: . I think then you're just going to have to try to find a psychologist who fits well with you who is more open to gay issues than this doctor you just saw. Can you call them on the phone or email them before setting up an appointment? That's what I did when I first started looking for a therapist, myself, I emailed several of them and asked them about their specialties and told them a very very basic line or two about what I needed help with to see if it was something they could deal with.

    As for whether you'd be comfortable with a man or a woman, that's really up to you. I am more comfortable with a woman, myself. Generally speaking do you feel you connect better with men, or with women? And if you had a female therapist would you feel more awkward if you had to discuss sexual issues with her? What if you had a male therapist?
     
    #8 TheStormInside, Sep 29, 2014
  9. bingostring

    bingostring
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    I won't add more than has been said already - except your country may have a register of therapists (professional institution ..etc) and the website may say which ones specialise in LGBT issues - if it helps

    If you have any LGBT support organisations, they may be able to email you a list of LGBT sensitive therapists.
     
    #9 bingostring, Sep 29, 2014
  10. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Not really on topic but, kind of related... This is the guy i was originally (still am) planning on seeing:

    (due to extreme laziness i used google translate)

    ^ Comes highly recommended by the "moms" from a local forum.

    Unlike most other psychologist i found, this guy actually is cheap on the hour, almost like 40% cheaper than most others (the majority of which were women in their late 20's, lol wut?!).

    Also, yes there is something like a registry and it didn't help. Lacking basic information like email/website.
     
    #10 shinji, Sep 29, 2014
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2014
  11. Starfleet

    Starfleet Guest

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    Shinji, this guy sounds much, much better. if it helps, a psychiatrist is a doctor that prescribes medicine. A psychotherapist is a professional who is trained to listen and help.
     
    #11 Starfleet, Sep 29, 2014
  12. Celatus

    Celatus
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    What starfleet said^
    Also my therapist is a nice middle aged guy and hes great :slight_smile:
    And if he says your depression is too advanced for paxil hes dead wrong. I started taking it while I was giving up on life and mildy suicidal and without it I dont know where Id be.
     
    #12 Celatus, Sep 29, 2014
  13. SeriousJack

    SeriousJack
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    God, talk about wall texts! Anyway, this guy you saw doesn't really seem very good, but try to think less about the therapist, and more about yourself. His job is to analyze you and help you overcome your emotional difficulties, trying to judge his abilities and competence really doesn't help. Trust me, I told my therapist I live psychology and now all our sessions just look like private lessons on psychology, and trying to analyze the methods he uses to analyze me reaally isn't helping with my OCD. Just show up, talk about all your feels, answer his questions, think about yourself and trust what his says. Everything beyond that won't help. Unless the guy is incompetent, which seems to be the case.
     
    #13 SeriousJack, Sep 29, 2014
  14. Chip

    Chip
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    A psychologist, psychotherapist, or clinical social worker is someone trained in psychology and psychotherapy. They use talk therapy and various non-drug interventions to help you understand your issues and resolve them. Their entire schooling is focused on understanding human mind, emotions, interaction, and interpersonal communication, and helping their clients better understand and make sense of their experiences.

    A psychiatrist is a medical doctor (MD) who is primarily trained in medicine (like any other physician) and receives extra training primarily in mental diseases and disorders. Psychiatrists primarily prescribe drugs so... you go to one, you're likely to come away with a prescription. To an extent, the old adage "When you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail" applies here. Most psychiatrists don't do a lot of talk therapy, and unless they've received a lot of extra training (separate from medical school), they usually aren't very good at it.

    Without getting fully on my soapbox about medications... medications are not (or at least, should not be) the first choice for mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and so forth. These conditions nearly always have underlying issues that cause or contribute to them, and medication, while necessary in some cases, is essentially a band-aid that doesn't really actually solve the problem, but just covers it up. That's one of the reasons I don't recommend a psychiatrist as the first stop; the psychotherapist will first evaluate you and discuss options, and will first try to work with the issue that are actually causing the depression so you can solve the problem rather than masking the symptoms. A much better solution in the long term.

    Medications can be helpful in the short term if you're simply non-functional; in most other cases, therapy by itself, while slower, will have better long-term effects, and you won't continue to need the medication.

    Also, please don't take anyone's advice about whether a given medication is or is not right for you, how much you should or should not be taking, or whether or not it will work; one of the most challenging aspects that the (few competent) psychiatrists face is that psychotropic medications react differently in every single person they are given to. 10 people with identical test results on, say, a depression index will respond completely differently to the same dose of a given drug; for some it might work perfectly, for others it will have no effect whatsoever, and for others, it will make them substantially worse. So it is almost an art form for the psychiatrist, particularly if there are multiple symptoms requiring multiple drugs, to get the right combination of drugs and dosage, and it can take months to get it right. Another reason why avoiding medications entirely is a better choice if it is a viable option.

    As far as Paxil, Prozac, Zoloft, or any of the other SSRIs... there are a number of studies out there that show that there is only a very small difference in effectiveness between any of these drugs and placebo (a fake drug) when given in blind tests. St. John's Wort (an herbal supplement) and 5-HTP has actually been shown to be as effective, and in some cases more effective, than SSRIs in several studies. This isn't to say that some people don't benefit from SSRIs, only that there's enough controversy about these drugs that -- when you look at the potential downside, toxicity, and side effects -- it's often worth considering the less toxic alternatives.
     
    #14 Chip, Sep 29, 2014
  15. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Sorry if my response seems to devalue the above posts.

    So to summarize everything... Don't take what this guy prescribed and wait for the 6'th of october to go and see this other guy then after i also talk to him about said medication (after we discuss everything else), i'll go from there depending on what he says.

    Great, now... what should i do for five days, to make the time pass faster. (・_・ヾ
     
    #15 shinji, Sep 30, 2014
  16. Starfleet

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    Talk with us, Shinji. We will help, and it'll pass the time. :slight_smile:
     
    #16 Starfleet, Sep 30, 2014
  17. Chip

    Chip
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    The medications he prescribed, as I understand it, are 5-HTP and melatonin. Neither are drugs; both are supplements, non-habit forming, safe, and often very effective. So there's no reason not to take those and see if they help (give it about 2 weeks before you'll feel the full effects.) When I was talking about the problems with medications, I was talking primarily about SSRIs and other powerful prescription drugs, not about nutritional supplements.
     
    #17 Chip, Sep 30, 2014
  18. Celatus

    Celatus
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    Yeah try it like Chip said who knows it could work :slight_smile:
     
    #18 Celatus, Sep 30, 2014
  19. Ophelia

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    Shinji--

    I don't know if this will be helpful to you at all, but I've suffered from panic attacks for a long time, some severe enough that I ended up at the hospital (minor heart issues), so I thought I could offer some short term suggestions. One thing that really helps me, and bear with me because this will sound silly, is trying to run through an entire song in my head and really focusing on it. What I mean is, I close my eyes, and think through a song I really love and try to "hear" it played through the whole way while breathing really slowly and deeply. It doesn't always work, but it's helped me in a few particularly stressful situations. Although I usually end up humming along outloud. It's started some interesting conversations about music at least :slight_smile:
     
    #19 Ophelia, Oct 1, 2014
  20. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    It is helpful and informative, but...

    I have my headphones practically glued to my head (have to buy new ones... these didn't last me even 6 months), and the music blasting on maximum. This is relaxing in a way and... at the same time very wrong. Because of this (and if i were to say, follow your suggestion) i lose the ability to focus on stuff that i probably wouldn't want to miss, like... that cute guy in the distance or, the pavement...
     
    #20 shinji, Oct 1, 2014
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