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I have a crush on my straight friend!

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by onlinedreamer, Oct 1, 2014.

  1. onlinedreamer

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    Location:
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    Lesbian
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    I don't know how to react on the feelings I'm having. Should I tell her, because I'm feeling like I'm violating her privacy by liking her when she doesn't know that I'm queer?:help:
     
  2. Rainbows~Exist

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    Only tell her if:
    .You're certain that she won't mind
    .Or that you're prepared for any changes in your friendship.

    This could affect your relationship with her so be careful.
     
  3. Ophelia

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    That seems.. difficult to say the least.

    First of all, don't worry, I don't think you could be violating her privacy or anything like that by liking her. Think of how many straight people who are attracted to their opposite gendered friends. There's no way every single person tells their crushes that they have feelings for them. I don't think your situation should be that much different, but that's just my opinion.

    A question I would ask before you say anything to her is, if she turns out to be attracted to women (or just you in particular) would you be planning on pursuing a relationship with her? Because that might change things.


    *also, I agree with Dr. Rorschach, you have to be prepared for the possible reprocussions.

    We're here for you. :slight_smile:
     
  4. onlinedreamer

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    Wow, thank you for all the advice, it really helps! I'm really surprised, because I didn't think anybody would care about my problems! So thank you again!!!
     
  5. Ophelia

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    Your problems are important and we're glad you're here.
     
  6. Beetle

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    This is all too common. I went through it once. You being friends complicates things. You can either:
    1) Tell her you have a crush on her to empty out your chest and take the load off. Beware it could make things awkward for her and she may want to drift away, or leave you completely. Or she wouldn't mind. I know when a male friend tells me he likes me, it makes me feel awkward. A lot of people will cling onto the hope that she may be secretly bi/gay but she is most likely straight and you will be disappointed.

    2) Don't tell her and let the crush fade. Trust me, it will, and you will find someone that can return the feelings. I went this route and I no longer have feelings for the ex-crush, haha. I then got a crush on another girl and a few months later she admitted to having a crush on me, and now we're dating!