Hey everyone. I posted here awhile back, but haven't been here for awhile.. Anyway, I'm 30 years old and disabled.. born with a rare birth defect which makes my bones weaker than most.. so I'm in a wheelchair. I'm also gay. I live in a small town.. which I think is part of my problem.. but I've never had a boyfriend, and I'm ridiculously lonely. Generally speaking I do fine.. I have a job, go to school full time, have friends.. but there's always this void.. and no matter how positive I try to feel, I'm pretty much always depressed. Although I've had people tell me I'll find someone.. sometimes I feel totally hopeless. I've tried dating sites.. and about the only people interested in me are in their 60s or older (no offense, but I want someone my own age).. for some reason.. and in person I've never had any luck at all.. Overall I just feel so lonely, and would love to have a relationship.. someone I can talk to about anything.. and just be close to..but I've never had that.. I feel that because I'm gay, my search for someone will be so much harder.. and at a lot of times.. especially now.. as I sit home alone, listening to music, mildly tipsy off of wine.. I feel shitty and that no one will ever want to be with me and I might as well just face the fact that I'll be alone forever. Shitty attitude? Absolutely.. but it's how I feel right now. Not sure what I'm trying to post here.. probably more of a rant, or just getting out my thoughts more than anything.. but.. yeah, feeling hopeless at the moment. I'm normally fine being independent.. but sometimes.. not so much. Ugh.. Any thoughts or suggestions appreciated. Wish I could find someone.. but between my disability and my anxiety.. I don't know..
*hugs* I know how it feels to feel helpless about ever finding someone. I also have a physical disability and anxiety/depression issues. It can make it so hard sometimes and I understand that, but there is always hope. <3 I'm afraid I don't have any specific advice at the moment, but I just wanted you to know that I'm here, I get how you are feeling, and I don't think you'll be alone forever. Until you find someone to support and love you, we're all here to help you find a way to fill that void. Hang in there.
Thank you sometimes just someone sending you a positive message helps. I know right now I'm sad but I'll get over it. I'm going to try to post on this forum more now. Could definitely use some new friends and some sort of support. Thanks for your response
Hey Tyrion...hang in there...you've got the right idea...acknowledging your sadness right now but affirming you'll get over it. Life is shitty...sometimes...but coming on here and making new friends is a positive step...haven't got any advice for you...other than keep doing what your doing and hopefully...eventually (like I guess most of us hope)...you will meet the person meant for you...until then keep reaching out and making friends where ever you can
I know the feeling as I also have a physical disability and I do sometimes wonder if I will ever meet someone as well, if there is anyone who can accept me as I am.. It does often feel like it's never gonna happen and that we will remain alone, so I do know how you feel, I really do.. I have seen people with the same disability that I do meet someone and get married so it does happen, so please never lose hope that it will happen. You will find one day someone wants to be with you because of who you are inside, just never lose the hope.. I haven't and I know I can't, I just have too much faith in myself and that there is someone out there for all us, even those of us who have medical impairments.
Thanks everyone . My anxiety has been terrible lately, but I'm feeling better at the moment. I'm working on dealing with my depression.. but that's easier said than done. Anyway, I really appreciate the comments.. and though I feel the way I explained in my main post often, I never give up.. and I feel that no one else should either. We all have our struggles..but that's life.. full of ups and owns. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel in my view.. we just don't always see it. Hope everyone is doing well. Again thanks or your responses.
Having a disability doesn't preclude you from finding love. Just hang in there, you are strong and you will eventually find someone. Just continue searching, never give up!
Hi, well don't give up. You are still young. I would also advice against dating websites as they have number of fake profiles, spammers, prostitutes and so on. Yes sure...some people there are genuine but it's like 15% or so - the majority always lie about something . It's just my experience. There is hope of course...my advice will be to look for someone IRL or...try something casual - such as facebook. But not dating sites or facebook. well...i guess i can be consideered an option too lol - i am less than 60 hehe - but...i am far, far away from America or even western europe - so you know. But good luck, don't give up just yet!
Thanks man.. and yeah, that's how it normally goes. Everyone I do meet who isn't 60 + and I really like generally live all the way across the world. I've been talking to someone for over a year; a totally nice guy.. and we have so much in common and a great connection.. but he lives in Europe. Go figure! On another note.. I'm so accustomed to forums with the like button.. I keep trying to like posts >.<. Damn it.. lol.
Hi Tyrion! I don't have much to add aside from what the others have said, but I just wanted to say 'hello' and you picked a great place to meet some good people. (*hug*)
Like what others have said, Acknowledging your sadness is a big step. I do not have a birth defect so I do not know how it must be for you but I can say that I suffer from Avoidant Personality Disorder and it's a living hell. I think it's great that you get to share your life here in this forum because I do think it helps a lot. I cannot answer your first question but I can say that there are people out there who found love despite any conditions of what they have. I think life is hard but what makes it easier is once you accept who you really are (I'm not only talking about on the physical but more importantly on the inside) and with the right people who supports you unconditionally.
