So basically, I have this guy I met on an online game that I play, and he knows I am openly gay. Him and I are really close friends, but I have always wanted to be more than friends with him, because I think he's literally the perfect guy and is the most attractive person ever.... But, the problem is... He says he's straight and has a girlfriend (irl not online). Now, I'd have no issue if that was the all and I would just back off and accept we were just friends, because I don't really get pissed off when this sort of thing happens, because it's common for gay males who are close with straight males. Anyway, the reason I am posting this, was because me and him would joke around a lot, saying we were "boyfriends" and he would actually always call me his boyfriend. One time, I got drunk and literally didn't know I said all this stuff until the next morning, but I pushed for things through text message and he was sorta playing along for a while, until he thought it was going too far. I don't know what to do, because I don't want to pursue things too much since he has a girlfriend, but they fight a lot and she seems to be the type to be with more than one guy at once, even though I don't have any proof of that aside from a bit of my friend's suspicions. Basically, I am asking, what the hell should I do? Should I try to get things going and see if he wants to experiment and perhaps something come out of it but risk ruining a relationship of his? Or should I just lay off a bit and accept we're friends even though I literally think he is the hottest individual to ever walk on this earth? Help. Please.
I know you really like this guy, but please don't try and experiment or push for something at this point in time. You know he's in a relationship, even if it is a rocky one. The last thing you want to do is make it look like you're trying to break them up or start some sort of drama. I'd say that the best thing is to continue your friendship as much as possible. Try not to worry about the girlfriend and such, and just focus on being friends with him. Who knows how the course of the relationship with his girlfriend will go, but this way, you'll be ready for whatever happens. You'd be surprised how often friends joke about being in a relationship even when they fully know they are seeing other people (I do it all the time with my best friend, who has a boyfriend. For pete's sake, we spooned all night at our first sleepover because we were freezing cold and have clarified there's nothing romantic going on between us). Just letting you know that things might suck a little bit. It's always hard to let a crush go, but that's probably the best thing you can do right now. That way, you won't lose your friendship with him.
To be extremely blunt. He's not gay. He will never be gay. He'll never leave his girlfriend for you. Whereas these aren't 100% certainties...they're probably still truth. It's so easy (and therefore hard) to fall for the 'perfect but straight' guy. I've done it. Twice. With the same person. But getting your hopes up. And seeing your 'chances' increase because his relationship rocky is like seeing a hairline crack in the great wall of china. It's irrelevant. Even if the wall crumbles, he'll still be straight.
