So, I have PTSD and one of the things that goes along with that is hyper vigilance and a need to know where everyone is at any given moment. Having someone behind me where I can't see them freaks me right out as does having someone in my peripheral so I try to keep a bit of distance. I recently joined a group of LGBT people who meet in my city and the sitting arrangements at the place where they meet is pretty spread out so I felt okay, but then the speaker asked us all to move closer together and I tried to resist, but they kept insisting and so I moved. Someone sat behind me, someone else was at my side, but slightly behind so it was hard to see them when I was looking at the speaker. I freaked out and my whole body started shaking and then someone closed the freaking door so I felt trapped and by that point I was in such a panic state that I couldn't have moved if I wanted to and...I liked the group and I want to go back, but I'm afraid that I'll be put in that situation again. I get really awkward when I try to explain my PTSD symptoms, because most people have no clue what it even is and I am a bit of a pushover when people ask me to do something (Such as move) and I don't resist very well. Does anyone have any advice for how to handle this or has anyone been in this position before?? Thanks in advance. It has me scared to go back to the meeting even though I really enjoyed the people. :help: Also, they kept trying to hug me and hugs feel like I'm being attacked, but I was so exhausted from my earlier freak out that I didn't even have the energy to deal with it and I just let them do whatever they wanted.
Have you considered speaking to thenp organzier of the LGBT group to exp,win your situation? Do you have concerns about others knowing about your space issues? If others understood your situation, my guess is that they would be accommodating and help you be more comfortable.
It's so embarrassing to have these problems. I mean, normal people aren't bothered by people sitting behind them or by the doors being closed, but for me it triggers a "Something very bad is going to happen right this second" kind of terror that is impossible to control. The leader of the group is really busy so it will be hard to talk to her in person, but I am thinking of sending an e-mail before the next meeting, but I don't want it to seem like I'm just being a whiny person.
Could you simply say you've got a "funny" back and sometimes need to get up so you like to sit at the back so as not to disturb anyone? You could also use this for hugging. If anyone appears to be approaching with the intent to hug, you could stick out your hand for a handshake instead and if this doesn't stop them, just say, "Sorry, my back is acting up." Frankly, I'm not much of a hugger and can be more like a piece of deadwood. Would rather not do it with, what are, basically strangers. On a side note - I saw this piece on tv once about Mensa and at their big meeting, they gave out red and green buttons which the participants chose depending on whether they were open to physical contact or not. Brilliant, eh? Well... It was Mensa. Also, try to just stand your ground about the seating. Move the slowest and just sit where you feel the most comfortable. It's not a classroom and you're allowed to do as you please. If anyone tries to insist, just keep repeating, "I'm good, thanks".
@Really, thank you. I think your response has made me feel more confident about standing my ground with the seating issue. As for the "back acting up" thing, I wouldn't even be lying. I have permanent nerve damage in my back so it is always hurting. I'll use that then and see how they respond. Thank you, again.
