Does anyone have advice as to how to find lgbt community? Specifically a lesbian community. I left the closet a year ago and it's been pure hell. I'm a college student and haven't found any lesbian community. My university has one of the top ranked lgbt centers, but in actuality it's kind of a depressing dump full of butches. Any advice? I've been very very depressed and alone recently and really don't know how much more I can take.
Another thread addressed this topic when I was asking a similar question. I was directed to looking into gay sports leagues in my area. And sure enough, there was tions to choose from.
Have you googled "city lesbian meetup"? Or just "city lesbians"? You might also want to rethink your opinion on the university lgbt centre. You can't judge people by how they look and I suspect butch is simply a style for many women not a reflection of their personality - whatever that would be. Get involved and help organize events that would attract people whose interests more closely match yours. And maybe someone more up your alley will stop by to check things out and if you're not there, you won't meet them. When I was at university I hung out at a sort of clubhouse that was revolting - I mean the building itself - and whose paid leader grossed me out - hygeine-wise (see, it was terrible) but I made a few quality friends there and even got some help for a calculus class I was taking that was invaluable. So, see? Something good can come out of a "dump".
You might think about counseling... there might be counseling available, even with lgbt background. If it is an lgbt center, do they offer specific ativities ? Like a literature club... etc ? What activities would you enjoy, that would bring you in contact with other people, not necessarily lgbt related ? If you are more femme, you might show a bit of rainbow accessoires at an lgbt meeting... and otherwise just be yourself, there are other femmes out there, and some butches might know some people who are more femme, too... (*hug*)
I've actually tried all of those, and I've tried them for the past year without any results. When I went to counseling, both counselors said they didn't know what to tell me..... and these were lgbt counselors! I know of one lesbian community, but it only has members who are 45+. I've spent an entire year trying to like the campus lgbt center but it's only gotten more disappointing. The place itself looks like a center for kindergartners. Another thing, I've also tried online dating which has also been a disaster. I'm at the end of my rope. I'm so lonely and desperate that I've started to think of things that I don't want to think. In my situation, it doesn't get better.
I've also been having a hard time finding a place where I can socialize with gay women my age who are coming out... my therapist suggested I try PFLAG. Apparently it's not just for family/friends, many gay people go there as well. Do you have a local PFLAG chapter you could try?
(*hug*) I would advise you to seek counseling immediately... just talking... You might have a look at this: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/anonymous-discussions/149346-where-can-i-meet-lgbtq-people.html#4 and this: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/chit-chat/149549-please-share-your-experience-internet-dating.html#18 There might be support groups by lgbt centers, some people liked those... And you really might try an activity you like, possibly only weekly... I had a language course with a few nice people, for example, and it was always something to look forward to... You could apply for full membership on EC, and join the chat... and meanwhile chat with others on their walls... (*hug*)
